Forum Overview :: The Knuckle Shuffle
 
Re: Solution: hire a male maid, oops that won't work by I need clarification 07/15/2009, 1:48am PDT
Quétinbec wrote:

No surprises there, but I'll ask what we're all thinking: does your wife know you wank to the nanny? Because secrets like those grow darker by the day. The seeds of INC's infidelity sprout into a handful of tissues.

Shockingly, I'm sure she's aware. We don't talk about my wanks a lot, though. I also don't cry much these days ("these days" = all the days since I turned five), so there's a lot of life I'm living incorrectly, I'm sure.

Quétinbec wrote:

I say you couldn't fuck the nanny

Ooooh, that does it! I'm gonna fuck her just to show you I can! Hang on, let me show her how to use IM so she can tell me about God and how I'm evil or whatever the fuck your horrible girlfriend blathers on about, before finally agreeing to fuck me after nonstop begging and finally flying back to her country to show her just how desperate and horny I am and how debased and worthless I think she is. This is gonna be great! Finally, a real relationship.

Quétinbec wrote:

but even if you could, you wouldn't yet, so you do the next best thing which is play up her hotness and make a song and dance about your "restraint" in not fucking her. How would a guy who's afraid to watch a whore documentary in front of his wife get away with hiring a "hot" nanny? Maybe she's hot relative to your wife, but that's a fucked baseline.

Maybe! But what if she really is hot? Can you afford to take that gamble? Have you ever fucked a hot chick, Quentinbec? Don't lie about Irene, please. Love may be obscuring your vision but the rest of us who don't love diseased morons aren't wanking to her pics. Although I have to admit during one session I thought of some broken down piece of shit car with "I fucked your sister" spray-painted on the hood and it didn't prevent me from finishing. I'm fully aware you're now going to think of me thinking of that during wank #4 tomorrow, but it's the price I'm willing to pay.

Quétinbec wrote:

The only reason I'm able to say the fuck of my future maid would be a sure thing is because we'd be living alone together in a crazy country and she almost certainly couldn't find anyone better than me and I'd order her to watch movies with me and I'd do the dishes with her. I would blur the lines. None of those things apply to you and your maid. My fuck is a sure thing; your fuck is a secret wank fantasy.

To put things in your terms: I'd rather have the fantasy of a fuck with a hot woman than the reality of fucking a Filipino (!!) in Bahrain after months of solitude and, let's face it, a shitload of crying.
PREVIOUS NEXT REPLY QUOTE
 
Koba, did you or your friends ever fuck an Arab? by Quétinbec 07/11/2009, 3:53pm PDT NEW
    Koba, it's time to answer this question. NT by Quétinbec 07/13/2009, 2:25pm PDT NEW
        Oh, sorry, no. by E. L. Koba 07/14/2009, 12:06am PDT NEW
            Re: Oh, sorry, no. by Quétinbec 07/14/2009, 3:01am PDT NEW
                Yes Koba, did you masturbate literally 100% of your waking hours? by Creexuls, a monster >:3 07/14/2009, 3:12am PDT NEW
                    We already know that QB wanks while thinking about soldiers by E. L. Koba 07/14/2009, 1:56pm PDT NEW
                        Maid fantasies by Quétinbec 07/14/2009, 3:40pm PDT NEW
                            You make it sound more complicated than it really is by Jerry Whorebach 07/14/2009, 4:39pm PDT NEW
                            Solution: hire a male maid, oops that won't work by I need clarification 07/14/2009, 4:45pm PDT NEW
                                Not even gypsies? NT by Mysterio 07/14/2009, 5:14pm PDT NEW
                                Re: Solution: hire a male maid, oops that won't work by Quétinbec 07/14/2009, 6:40pm PDT NEW
                                    Re: Solution: hire a male maid, oops that won't work by Quétinbec Sr. 07/14/2009, 7:16pm PDT NEW
                                    Like trying to insult Howard Stern on his own show. You lose everytime, man. NT by Don't do it. 07/14/2009, 9:02pm PDT NEW
                                        If you do it on someone else's show though Howard loses. NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 07/14/2009, 9:12pm PDT NEW
                                            Good idea, I'll go post on POE about what a castrated shell of a man INC is. NT by Quétinbec 07/14/2009, 9:14pm PDT NEW
                                                Funny Ators only, please. NT by Quétinbec 07/14/2009, 9:57pm PDT NEW
                                                    Why, so you can sweep in and take credit for something clever you didn't post? by Quétinbec 07/15/2009, 12:28pm PDT NEW
                                    INC's Jewish. (Not white) NT by Fortinbras 07/14/2009, 9:52pm PDT NEW
                                    Re: Solution: hire a male maid, oops that won't work by I need clarification 07/15/2009, 1:48am PDT NEW
                                        Re: Solution: hire a male maid, oops that won't work by Quétinbec 07/16/2009, 10:24pm PDT NEW
                                            Re: Solution: hire a male maid, oops that won't work by I need clarification 07/16/2009, 11:54pm PDT NEW
                                            I read "To each his own" as "You're right, I'm a fucking loser" NT by Fortinbras 07/17/2009, 12:01am PDT NEW
                                                If you read everything that way, you'd save us a lot of time. NT by Quétinbec 07/17/2009, 2:45pm PDT NEW
                                                    Haha NT by I need clarification 07/17/2009, 2:51pm PDT NEW
                            Re: Maid fantasies by Quétinbec Sr. 07/14/2009, 5:54pm PDT NEW
                            Re: Driver drivel by Honk Honk 07/14/2009, 9:20pm PDT NEW
                                Hey, no money outs! It's fun to see him wrestle with the problems of a teenager NT by Fussbett 07/14/2009, 9:33pm PDT NEW
                                Re: Driver drivel by Quétinbec 07/14/2009, 9:56pm PDT NEW
    mark all as read, minimize NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 07/14/2009, 8:13pm PDT NEW
        What will you do with the time you saved? NT by Fussbett 07/14/2009, 9:13pm PDT NEW
            BOIL AN EGG NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 07/14/2009, 9:25pm PDT NEW
                Paint a picture NT by fight club 07/15/2009, 10:27am PDT NEW
            I'm learning French. NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 07/14/2009, 9:58pm PDT NEW
            1NrcvFXdRe0 by Weyoun Voidbringer 07/14/2009, 10:44pm PDT NEW
                the hepburn family are all admitted socialists, LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN etc by Weyoun Voidbringer 07/14/2009, 11:04pm PDT NEW
                    He's gone insane. NT by Fortinbras 07/14/2009, 11:38pm PDT NEW
                        I wish Josh would PROPERLY ignore all my threads forever. NT by Quétinbec 07/15/2009, 12:18am PDT NEW
                            Wish in one hand and crap in the other and see which piles up faster. 8( NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 07/15/2009, 12:19am PDT NEW
                            yes, tampering with your utterly unreadable threads with my quality posts by Weyoun Voidbringer 07/15/2009, 1:27am PDT NEW
                                You're a faggot cocksucker douchebag. NT by Worm 07/15/2009, 1:40pm PDT NEW
                                mark all as read, minimize NT by quality posts 07/15/2009, 2:13pm PDT NEW
                                Re: yes, tampering with your utterly unreadable threads with my quality posts by Caltrops Reality Check Team 07/15/2009, 6:25pm PDT NEW
                                    ...unless he keeps insulting his girlfriend so badly that he makes himself cry. NT by Fullofkittens 07/15/2009, 6:37pm PDT NEW
 
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