 |
||
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
| Korea Part 2 by Quétinbec 06/25/2009, 6:46pm PDT | ||||
 |
 |
|||
Seoul Metropolitan police! We're here about a murder! One of the Koreans we lived with did his two years compulsory military service with the riot division of the Seoul Police. He said everyone in his unit had cut the top off the batons they received and filled them with concrete. They had to sleep in buses outside US military bases and beat off anti-US protesters. He said they usually didn't give a fuck but one time a friend in his unit lost half his pinky when it got caught between two riot shields so they wasted the FUCK out of the protesters that day and it made the news. As a foreigner, you didn't really have to worry about the Korean police. You have to worry about poor, corrupt police, and rich non-corrupt police, but rich corrupt police can't be fucked following through with threats to take some idiot foreigner back to the station on some bullshit, say, littering charge if he doesn't pay a $50 bribe. They've got brothels to extort! And they can't be fucked going to bother of arresting you on some actual charge because legally, they have to wait for an interpreter. I got caught stealing a road sign as a souvenir. I ripped it off the wall at a station without anyone seeing, but it was bigger than I thought and wouldn't fit in the bag I'd brought to conceal it! So I had to walk through the train station with this road sign trying to hide it by putting the empty bag in front of it, which was awkward and made me look a million times dodgier. These two cops at the booth looked at me the whole way during my approach and were talking, but left me alone. After that, and towards the end of the year, we tested how much we could get away with. Nothing naughty, just walking into Amusement parks and museums at night and fucking around. You'd get caught eventually, but they'd just be like, "No! No!" And point to the exit. How cool is it to walk around a dark, empty foreign museum at night? Cooler than it sounds! There was a Canadian guy with a proper teaching job at the university who boasted about fucking so many prostitutes. There was a little posse of Canadians who'd all boast about their fucks. It was the first time I'd met dick Canadians, and such was their dickiness that my view of Canadians was forever soured. Basically, every teacher in Korea boasts about the amount of sex they're having because it's the only justification for being there, but the boasts of these Canadians fucked me off in particular because they were old and fat and two of them had prettier girlfriends than me. Where is the justice in that? On those grounds, natural law grants me the authority to fuck whores. Anyway, one of the Canadians would volunteer at a local orphanage to help pretend to himself that he was a good person. We'd go with him because we had nothing better to do. Most orphans are just like normal kids and not sad and needy as you'd imagine them. What a let down! The exception was this girl: 
She had this thing where she'd grab hold of anyone who came within arm's reach of her and just hold them. A beautiful thing! She was too young to be cunning so you could safely believe she wanted to stay close to you because she didn't want you to leave. It was sad. She liked to sing so I tried to teach her the words to Tracy Chapman's 'Fast Car' because I thought it would be a fucking awesome thing for an orphan to sing! But her memory was terrible so we never got past the first few lines. Also, one of the foreigners called me an idiot because the opening words are "Do you got a fast car" and he thought I shouldn't teach such awful English. Only two photos today! |
||||
 |
 |
|||
|
