Forum Overview :: Icewind Dale
 
Re: Oh yes I would like to add by out le temps/Au suivant! Au suivan 09/15/2008, 11:46pm PDT
Creexul's Undocumented Post Double wrote:

Estimado Senorita Zseni,

Senor Juan Cable has asked me to type that you remind him of a girl named setsuna. The gist is that you are a corpulent blob that starts babbling in foreign languages to uncaring audiences for the hope of attention. But I know that you are so much more than that. I mean physically. You are so much more fat than a corpulent blob.

And I love it. Truthfully, I fantasize about dumping sixteen entire buckets of glazed Kentucky Fried Chicken with barbecue sauce all over your gargantuan mound-like frame and then fucking you in the ass or in one of those plentiful moist, hefty rolls.

Yours,

Enrico


Enrico:

Thanks for writing and allow me to extend to you a fond welcome to America. I am pleased to find that unlike so many of your ungrateful compatriots, you have bothered to learn our national language and many of our more important social orderings.

To answer your many comments and questions, in brief:

Yes, I am tremendously fat, like a couch or a cartoon dragon. However I cannot allow myself to be doused in KFC; those chickens died unhappy deaths and the barbeque sauce is laden with corn syrup and artificial flavors. Further, I do not suffer myself to be touched at all by your class of people. I hope you will understand that I maintain this policy for the many benefits that it endows unto both of us.

Yes, Setsuna and I have many things in common. We both enjoy a form of television congruent to your gay porn: anime. We also are both fat women, as you have stated, and we both use foreign languages, which, as I have previously noted, you are right not to do. However Setsuna acts like a teenage girl because she is one, and I act like one because I'm immature and, to be honest, grieving for a youth than I have completely wasted. At my stage in life, attention is secondary - the main thing is to do the deed with youth's foolish heart, and to consequently pretend that I still have that sweet flowing summertime animating my exhausted, antique, and corpulent person.

No, my sense of humor is not self-deprecating. Or rather, when I say self-deprecating things, I don't mean them to be funny. Most American men assure me that I'm not at all funny so I didn't realize that this could be a problem. Thank you for bringing this item to my attention.

Finally, the French is from Jacque Brel's song Au Suivant, a ballad which harrowingly recounts a young soldier's experience in a mobile whorehouse during his military service. The soldier consequently contracts syphilis, which plagues him for the rest of his life, and he tells his tale as an old man haunted by the disease as the living avatar of all that is awful about war and the military mind. It was intended - not as a joke, for reasons previously discussed - as a poetic reference to Creex' advanced state of sexual anxiety and despair.

Thank you again for writing; it is always a pleasure to make a pen pal from the lower orders. The next time you write, please include some colorful anecdotes for me to take to my next polo luncheon!

Yours,
Zsenijeim
PREVIOUS NEXT REPLY QUOTE
 
Romanian by Quétinbec 09/13/2008, 9:40pm PDT NEW
    Eastern Euro Sassy NT by John Cusak 09/13/2008, 11:00pm PDT NEW
        That's kind of a stretch [nsfw] by Ray of Light 09/14/2008, 12:52am PDT NEW
            She doesn't really look like her at all. NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/14/2008, 9:10am PDT NEW
                You guys could compare porn\looks_like_sassy folders! by Worm 09/14/2008, 10:43am PDT NEW
                    this one doesn't look like sasy this one doesn't look like sasy this one doesn't NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 09/14/2008, 11:06am PDT NEW
                        my porn folders are in disarray too! NT by Worm 09/14/2008, 11:27am PDT NEW
                            its like hes replying to posts that someone else made NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 09/14/2008, 11:38am PDT NEW
                                My fatal mistake was putting apostrophes in my fake jsoh post I guess! by Worm 09/14/2008, 11:44am PDT NEW
                                    That was a pretty good fake jso post actually. NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/14/2008, 11:52am PDT NEW
                                    He means you can't comprehend other people's posts. Why can't you anyway? NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/14/2008, 12:02pm PDT NEW
                                        I wish I couldn't comprehend jsoh posts. Better yet I wish I couldn't fucking se NT by Worm 09/14/2008, 12:13pm PDT NEW
                                            Yeah thanks wrom. NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/14/2008, 12:36pm PDT NEW
                                                Also I'm disadvantaged in not having jsoh explaining the posts to me. NT by Worm 09/14/2008, 1:09pm PDT NEW
                                                    even if I explained them you wouldn't understand NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 09/14/2008, 2:20pm PDT NEW
                                                        Well you'd need to explain them to me in a horrible post, so yeah. NT by Worm 09/14/2008, 2:30pm PDT NEW
                                                            It would be a horrible post. by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/14/2008, 3:08pm PDT NEW
                                                                Weird! I don't see the NT. No reason to click, what more could anyone say? NT by Worm 09/14/2008, 3:15pm PDT NEW
                                                                    The NT only shows for posts that don't have text in them. NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/14/2008, 7:57pm PDT NEW
                Jhoh has never come to terms with the many revs of Sassy by Ray of Light 09/14/2008, 1:27pm PDT NEW
                    so she had a nose job with your money? by Weyoun Voidbringer 09/14/2008, 2:22pm PDT NEW
                        Thanks Jwho. by Ray of Light 09/14/2008, 7:21pm PDT NEW
                            Crashing into a house while drunk was a story that she told publically. by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/14/2008, 8:41pm PDT NEW
                                "and Sassy would never deceive her public. QED." by Ray of Light 09/14/2008, 10:16pm PDT NEW
                                    Re: "and Sassy would never deceive her public. QED." by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/14/2008, 10:41pm PDT NEW
                                        I will compare the two stories so that people can make up their own minds! by Ray of Light 09/15/2008, 6:17am PDT NEW
                                            JUST SO HAPPENED TO WORK OUT PERFECTLY by Weyoun Voidbringer 09/15/2008, 7:08am PDT NEW
                                                He's saying she lied. That it never happened. That it was a falsehood. NT by Stupid 09/15/2008, 10:49am PDT NEW
                                                    thank you, Stupid, that makes perfect sense by Weyoun Voidbringer 09/15/2008, 11:09am PDT NEW
                    Re: Jhoh has never come to terms with the many revs of Sassy by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/14/2008, 3:10pm PDT NEW
                    Ray picks his women like he does TF2 servers NT by FABIO 09/14/2008, 9:05pm PDT NEW
                        YEAH AND HE'S GAY HA HA NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/14/2008, 9:22pm PDT NEW
            Please tell me that models name so I can gather more NT by --- 09/14/2008, 11:52am PDT NEW
                This is how you do it --> "Sauce?" NT by Anonymous 09/14/2008, 11:58am PDT NEW
                It came from 4chan. by Ray of Light 09/14/2008, 1:36pm PDT NEW
                    UPDATE: teendreams.com by Ray of Light 03/13/2009, 8:12am PDT NEW
                        NWS ^ NT by laudablepuss 03/13/2009, 8:14am PDT NEW
                        I've never been more thankful for a necropost by up with pod people 03/13/2009, 2:39pm PDT NEW
                            Writing myself in for post of the year in this thread NT by Entropy Stew 03/13/2009, 9:03pm PDT NEW
                        That should've been posted in the wank forum. This thread shouldn't've been bump by Quétinbec 03/13/2009, 8:56pm PDT NEW
                            It's the same girl as before, isn't it? NT by Fullofkittens 03/13/2009, 9:50pm PDT NEW
                            the royal we of Quétinbec + Quétinbec's erection by up with pod people 03/13/2009, 10:27pm PDT NEW
                        Re: UPDATE: teendreams.com by Tricknology 03/13/2009, 9:33pm PDT NEW
                            Her hair is cute and her face is pretty but her ass is hairy in the 2nd pic. NT by Quétinbec 03/13/2009, 10:09pm PDT NEW
                                Also, Ray is bald and pines for hair. NT by Quétinbec 03/13/2009, 10:11pm PDT NEW
                                    AND I have combination skin by Ray of Light 03/14/2009, 4:38am PDT NEW
                                Why did you repeat what Tricknology just said about the ass hair? NT by I also just want to understand 03/13/2009, 11:11pm PDT NEW
                                    Oops by Quétinbec 03/14/2009, 12:05am PDT NEW
                            1) completeness 2) that was one of Jhoh's big Sassy criticisms by Ray of Light 03/14/2009, 3:24am PDT NEW
                                1, that's terror, 2, that's terror. by Creexuls, a monster >:3 03/14/2009, 3:49am PDT NEW
            Yeah, sorry about that guys! It was weak and must need to wank more. by Quétinbec 09/15/2008, 6:34am PDT NEW
                Hey, man, let's just be real by Ray of Light 09/15/2008, 9:51am PDT NEW
                    stogies are jumpin off here NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 09/15/2008, 11:58am PDT NEW
                    Re: Hey, man, let's just be real by REAL TALK 09/15/2008, 12:52pm PDT NEW
                    She doesn't look rotund to me, in fact just the opposite. by Jerry Whorebach 09/15/2008, 1:45pm PDT NEW
                        Maybe not rotund, more like pre-rotund. She looks like she's primed to explode. NT by Ray of Light 09/15/2008, 1:49pm PDT NEW
                            She exploded for a while (when she came to see me) then deflated after I called NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/15/2008, 2:17pm PDT NEW
                    Re: Hey, man, let's just be real by Ice Cream Jonsey 09/15/2008, 2:20pm PDT NEW
                        She wouldn't have even come here if I didn't post all the stuff about her. by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/15/2008, 2:24pm PDT NEW
                            "preemptively" "sycophant" "ray" "did" by Ray of Light 09/15/2008, 2:51pm PDT NEW
                            Yes, but she is charming. C'mon, you were charmed at first! >CHARM PERSON! NT by Ice Cream Jonsey 09/15/2008, 2:56pm PDT NEW
                                Don't forget that two of the charms are big tits. NT by That's powerful stuff. 09/15/2008, 3:07pm PDT NEW
                                    Lopsided implants. NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/15/2008, 3:10pm PDT NEW
                                        False NT by Ray of Light 09/15/2008, 4:12pm PDT NEW
                                            I grabbed them, they're fake. NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/15/2008, 5:04pm PDT NEW
                                                Unlicensed, unofficial, hatless boob inspector. NT by Last 09/15/2008, 5:25pm PDT NEW
                                                Very little of what you've said today makes any fucking sense! by Ray of Light 09/15/2008, 6:31pm PDT NEW
                                                Re: I grabbed them, they're fake. by Tricknology 03/13/2009, 9:34pm PDT NEW
                        Re: Hey, man, let's just be real by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/15/2008, 3:22pm PDT NEW
                            Re: Hey, man, let's just be real by MCHF MAKR 09/15/2008, 3:29pm PDT NEW
                                That's not hardcore enough psh (THE PLEBEIANS ARE TRYING TO SHUT US DOWN). NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/15/2008, 3:30pm PDT NEW
                                    Re: That's not hardcore enough psh (THE PLEBEIANS ARE TRYING TO SHUT US DOWN). by motherfuckerfoodeater 09/15/2008, 4:26pm PDT NEW
                                        Re: That's not hardcore enough psh (THE PLEBEIANS ARE TRYING TO SHUT US DOWN). by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/15/2008, 5:04pm PDT NEW
                                            Weak. Try again. NT by motherfuckerfoodeater 09/15/2008, 5:10pm PDT NEW
                                                MY CROWN NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/15/2008, 5:27pm PDT NEW
                                            Feature Req: forbid full-length titles on deeply nested posts NT by Ray of Light 09/16/2008, 6:19pm PDT NEW
                                                Rationale? NT by Entropy Stew 09/16/2008, 8:18pm PDT NEW
                                                    To prevent screen-scrolling or the dreaded line break, GUH. NT by Jerry Whorebach 09/16/2008, 9:17pm PDT NEW
                                                        Then maybe fix the layout instead of cutting post titles? NT by Entropy Stew 09/17/2008, 5:24am PDT NEW
                                                            Maybe fix it so you don't have to click on every single post like sko caveman? NT by Jerry Whorebach 09/17/2008, 12:47pm PDT NEW
                            Re: Hey, man, let's just be real by Zsenitan 09/15/2008, 4:55pm PDT NEW
                                Re: Hey, man, let's just be real by MCHF MAKR 09/15/2008, 5:12pm PDT NEW
                                    Re: Hey, man, let's just be real by motherfuckerfoodeater 09/15/2008, 5:16pm PDT NEW
                                        I just want to know what Zseni SAID to the cops to make them arrest her. by MCHF MAKR 09/15/2008, 5:21pm PDT NEW
                                            Re: I just want to know what Zseni SAID to the cops to make them arrest her. by Zsenitan 09/15/2008, 5:57pm PDT NEW
                                            Are you kidding? Have you seen a Zseni post? There are internet warrants out o NT by FORUM COP Tango 09/15/2008, 7:22pm PDT NEW
                                Okay so what does this have to do with anything? :( NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/15/2008, 5:26pm PDT NEW
                                    It is true that I never slept with Creex, or indeed with anyone who couldn't, uh by Zsenitan 09/15/2008, 5:59pm PDT NEW
                                        Re: It is true that I never slept with Creex, or indeed with anyone who couldn't by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/15/2008, 6:13pm PDT NEW
                                            Je jure sur la tête de ma première vérole / Que cette voix depuis je l'entends t by out le temps/Au suivant! Au suivan 09/15/2008, 9:28pm PDT NEW
                                                OYE! by Creexul's Undocumented Post Double 09/15/2008, 11:05pm PDT NEW
                                                    Oh yes I would like to add by Creexul's Undocumented Post Double 09/15/2008, 11:22pm PDT NEW
                                                        Re: Oh yes I would like to add by out le temps/Au suivant! Au suivan 09/15/2008, 11:46pm PDT NEW
                                                            So these were our punishment for not caring about your poem or whatever? NT by Jerry Whorebach 09/16/2008, 1:45am PDT NEW
                                                            Polo luncheon? OH SHIT! I'll get either ridden or eaten. Probably both. NT by A horse 09/16/2008, 12:23pm PDT NEW
                    Re: Hey, man, let's just be real by Quétinbec 09/16/2008, 9:32am PDT NEW
                        Curses by Fussbett 09/16/2008, 11:48am PDT NEW
                            Re: Curses by Quétinbec 09/17/2008, 5:27am PDT NEW
                        Poor enough to afford Evian. No Deja Blue crap for me! NT by Montezuma's Mischief 09/16/2008, 12:19pm PDT NEW
                        Are you having the piss? by Ray of Light 09/16/2008, 6:12pm PDT NEW
                            Re: Are you having the piss? by Quétinbec 09/17/2008, 5:41am PDT NEW
                                Baggage! by Fussbett 09/17/2008, 1:06pm PDT NEW
                                    I'm gonna guess "put an egg on your face" doesn't make the best pick-up line :( NT by Jerry Whorebach 09/18/2008, 1:28am PDT NEW
                                    Virginity! by Quétinbec 09/18/2008, 6:00am PDT NEW
                                        Re: Virginity! by motherfuckerfoodeater 09/18/2008, 9:54am PDT NEW
                                        In this post, a hidden implication about lesbianism. by Fussbett 09/18/2008, 6:02pm PDT NEW
                                    WELL. . . NT by HE'S GAY! 09/18/2008, 11:10am PDT NEW
                Re: Yeah, sorry about that guys! It was weak and must need to wank more. by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/15/2008, 11:22am PDT NEW
                    she is an ok girl (stung by a platypus) NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 09/15/2008, 3:20pm PDT NEW
    I feel better about not leaving the house ever now (hell is other people). NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/13/2008, 11:07pm PDT NEW
    Pfft what do you know about love anyway. by Zsenitan 09/14/2008, 2:50am PDT NEW
        That is, catapult the evil ones from your vicinity until next Tuesday. NT by MCHF MAKR 09/14/2008, 9:03am PDT NEW
    And you had the nerve to tell me the girl I loved but never fucked was unattract NT by Jerry Whorebach 09/14/2008, 4:18am PDT NEW
        I don't mean to bag on your girlfriend, BUT... by Jerry Whorebach 09/14/2008, 5:17am PDT NEW
            Re: I don't mean to bag on your girlfriend, BUT... by Entropy Stew 09/14/2008, 8:45pm PDT NEW
                Bulbed! NT by POE fag 09/14/2008, 8:59pm PDT NEW
                Re: I don't mean to bag on your girlfriend, BUT... by Quétinbec 09/15/2008, 6:36am PDT NEW
                Once again Stew has kicked all our asses NT by Ice Cream Jonsey 09/15/2008, 9:37pm PDT NEW
    Re: Romanian by motherfuckerfoodeater 09/14/2008, 11:30am PDT NEW
    Re: Romanian by Moog 09/14/2008, 11:58am PDT NEW
    This is you by Isn't it? 09/16/2008, 5:50pm PDT NEW
        Look at this fucking sleuth. Detective Monthsago. NT by Fussbett 09/16/2008, 6:11pm PDT NEW
            Now, now. NT by Now, now, now. 09/16/2008, 6:48pm PDT NEW
        So what? Is it a bit shit, friend? NT by Quétinbec 09/17/2008, 5:45am PDT NEW
    Bump! NT by Mysterious Stranger 05/29/2010, 7:49pm PDT NEW
 
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