sb wrote:

Fully. That's why I'm here, making an apology for doing so and offering back the half of the orphanage I found this morning.

Senor Barborito wrote:

Bill Dungsroman wrote:

I hope you realize that the thought of ever having trusted you to simply keep this place up makes me physically fucking ill.

It shouldn't.

sb wrote:

I'd say there's more than one, but there is one that is far bigger than all the rest - I fundamentally do not understand how to speak with other people, or why they react the way they do to the words that I say. I treat everybody the way I wish others would treat me, and with the constant negative reactions I receive from this behavior, you would think somebody so quick to pick up new bodies of knowledge would fucking learn by now. The problem is that you learn not just from your failures, but by your successes - if you don't HAVE any successes, you only discourage yourself from participating at all, and as someone with genuine social needs and a neurosis-induced inability to fill them in real life, that's not a workable solution.

I've had a lot of success in general in working to fix the rabid paranoia bit lately, although it comes far too late for Caltrops' sake, but it still seems that every word that tumbles out of my mouth immediately gets under everybody's skin. You seem intent on deconstructing me here, so maybe you can tell me why that is.

I am increasingly less crazy, but I don't expect you to really believe that.

You're wrong here - I know how people on the Internet behave, even if I don't know how to talk to them properly.

I knew what the reaction to my deleting Caltrops would be, and what people would be talking about when I lied about veronica. I did it anyway because I valued the few friendships I still had at Caltrops. Almost all of those people have since said things that indicate they didn't think as much of those friendships as I was lead to believe. I also am fully aware of the what the longterm results of this thread will be in terms of grief, harrassment, bullshit, and being stalked

You want to get your shots in. I understand. I'm sitting here letting you do so rather than passing off the data in the middle of the night through backchannels.

V deserves to be publicly cleared of doing anything wrong

"Bill, please convince me not to delete Caltrops" was more or less what I said. You didn't have to capitulate or crawl like a worm or any such bullshit. I needed a shoulder to cry on, you provided one, and then I explained about my whole GA paranoia complex.

As for ES, that was a different matter entirely. Stepto and ES were screaming at each other non-stop and spiraling into uncharted realms of rage, feeding off each other. Stepto was screaming about how he'd rescind rule #1 of GA so that his screaming hordes would pile in, and ES was pulling a Bushesque "BRING IT ON!" act. So I did what I had to do in order to diffuse the situation. I threatened them both with the closest thing I had to nuclear weapons. I told Stepto if he didn't fucking shut up for five minutes I'd get him fired, and I told Entropy Stew if he didn't fucking shut up for five minutes I'd wipe Caltrops clean. You know what? My empty threats worked. One of the few times I have ever had any success with complex interpersonal communication. They both sat down, shut up, and let me play intermediary long enough for them to start speaking civilly directly to one another. I later sat down and explained at great length to ES about my ridiculous paranoia regarding GA, and made sure he realized that I never actually intended to carry out that threat.

Bill Dungsroman wrote:

And then later, when I told you you need to step down, you didn't even believe it was me posting? Oh, motherfucker, it was me, alright. It was me coaxing you into finally fucking giving the site up. You made it crystal fucking clear where the site stood during the Lollerson ordeal.

No, you were right then. The Lollerson ordeal was the point when it should've been clear to everyone including me that I was no longer fit to be an admin, if I ever was.

At this point, it's not only inconsequential as you say, but posting it 100 or 1,000 times more isn't going to do any further damage. Why worry about that? I'm not sure what reason I have to be concerned that people will continue talking about it.

Of course not. I made it pretty clear in my first post that I did not expect that.

There was one single stipulation, which I quickly thought better of, and me pointing out a rather nasty hole

Bill Dungsroman wrote:

Fuck, I want to fucking vomit, I want to fucking punch you in the fucking faggot face and make a fucking necklace of your fucking teeth and fuck your sister until she has seizures, you fucking hump. You come here with a Forgiveness Score of -1,000,000 and make a peace offering that lands you a net adjustment of -250,000 more. Holy fucking fuck.

Yeah, you're angry.

I'd like to ask you something here

- have you EVER known me to be subtle? Ever? At all? Even a tiny bit? If I were making a threat, you would know it. It would sound something like, "Pull the Metafilter posts or I pull your fucking site." It wouldn't sound like "Hey, guys, have you ever considered that this type of behavior could someday land you in legal trouble with someone who is significantly more of an asshole than myself?"

Chief, it's obvious you don't know what you're talking about when you say things like 'running a whois,' so please don't embarrass either one of us by pretending otherwise. The only possible sense in which that would be the correct term is if you looked up the whois data on my domains and even a cursory glance should tell you that information is intentionally wildly out of date. My address, phone number, and as of Wednesday my IP address are nowhere to be found on the Internet in any capacity which links them to me, I guarantee it - both V and I had made a point of not entering any of that data in, anywhere, since we moved.

I deserve it.

--maranda HAHA ZING