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Re: Okay! by laudablepuss 09/24/2004, 4:37pm PDT
Zseni wrote:

Umberto loves to eat but hates to be fat, so he jogs off all his food. The way he told it to me in emails, it sounded like he measured food in miles to jog, like a teenaged girl. Umberto especially likes pie. When he was "on the road" he would tell me about the boring sad-shack places he was at and the fattening dinners he wanted to eat but couldn't eat, or that he did eat and had to keep it short (~15 pages instead of 30) so he could go jog.

I just think it must be hard for him to eat anything, what with the memory of veronica's cunt lingering in his thoughts.

Funny veronica story! She suffered from thousands of allergies and there was very little she could comfortably eat. I used to think that was because she had sko psycho immune system, but now I know it was Umberto-residue all over the inside of her body, like so much TP on a house after Halloween.


Allow me to be Peter Graves and sum up: Soooo, Umberto is gay like Richard Simmons, scarred (worse) for life after seeing V's hideous axe-wound, and his jizz is toxic sewage. Interesting. Wouldn't it be more like wallpaper on the inside of a house, though? Or poisonous Pepto Bismol coating her insides, except sickly yellow-white instead of Fabio Purple.
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Another fun fact about Umberto (who fucked Veronica) by I need clarification 09/21/2004, 10:56pm PDT NEW
    On the other hand: Tom Lehrer! Maybe. :( by Creexul :( 09/22/2004, 1:34am PDT NEW
    Re: Another fun fact about Umberto (who fucked Veronica) by Bill Dungsroman 09/23/2004, 2:30pm PDT NEW
        Re: Another fun fact about Umberto (who fucked Veronica) by I need clarification 09/23/2004, 3:58pm PDT NEW
            Re: Another fun fact about Umberto (who fucked Veronica) by Bill Dungsroman 09/23/2004, 4:45pm PDT NEW
                Re: Another fun fact about Umberto (who fucked Veronica) by I need clarification 09/23/2004, 5:22pm PDT NEW
                    Skip you fags. Here's another story about how much Umberto sucks. by Zseni 09/23/2004, 6:07pm PDT NEW
                        Re: Skip you fags. Here's another story about how much Umberto sucks. by laudablepuss 09/23/2004, 6:12pm PDT NEW
                            Okay! by Zseni 09/23/2004, 6:23pm PDT NEW
                                Re: Okay! by laudablepuss 09/24/2004, 4:37pm PDT NEW
                    Re: Another fun fact about Umberto (who fucked Veronica) by Bill Dungsroman 09/23/2004, 6:53pm PDT NEW
                Re: Another fun fact about Umberto (who fucked Veronica) by I need clarification 09/24/2004, 1:01pm PDT NEW
                    Re: Another fun fact about Umberto (who fucked Veronica) by Bill Dungsroman 09/24/2004, 5:21pm PDT NEW
                        WHO CARES by Tycho of Penny Arcade fame 09/24/2004, 6:21pm PDT NEW
 
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