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by Mischief Maker 08/01/2011, 12:17am PDT |
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Kensington Expert Louse 8.0 wrote:
I dunno about some of these other guys, but the thought of a woman sucking her husband's cock and then needing dick so badly she lets me in after he goes to work and fucks me is okay. It's not awful, right?
Actually recent research indicates that the human penis is evolutionarily designed for sloppy seconds.
Take a look at the Bonobo for a second, our closest genetic relative well known for fuck-fests. Males don't fight over females, the evolutionary competition takes place at the sperm level. Relative to body size, their balls are enormous and they blast the females with huge amounts of sperm. However, bonobo sex lasts around 15 seconds.
Relative to body size, the human penis is enormous and oddly shaped. Compared to the more common cone-shaped penises, humans have a flared glans. Research has found that the shape of the human penis actually creates a vacuum in the vagina that pulls out penis sperm left behind by recent sex partners. At the point of ejaculation the glans deflates to break the vacuum and not suck any of your own sperm out. This also explains why a human male who isn't thinking of baseball takes a full 5-10 minutes to ejaculate, to better clean out the works. Thanks to this physical trick, humans can also limit sex competition to the sperm level, but can get away with smaller gonads, the nutrients saved going to support larger energy-hungry brains.
Mark Twain, 'Letters from the Earth' wrote:
Now there you have a sample of man's "reasoning powers," as he calls them. He observes certain facts. For instance, that in all his life he never sees the day that he can satisfy one woman; also, that no woman ever sees the day that she can't overwork, and defeat, and put out of commission any ten masculine plants that can be put to bed to her. He puts those strikingly suggestive and luminous facts together, and from them draws this astonishing conclusion: The Creator intended the woman to be restricted to one man. |
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TAFKAM sitrep and under-rated movie thread. by TAFKAM 06/05/2011, 5:22pm PDT 
I LOVE PIZZA AND HATE MY EX WIFE. WHAT ARE SOME GOOD MOVIES? NT by Dear Yahoo Answers 06/05/2011, 5:43pm PDT
People who love pizza don't order Domino's. NT by motherfuckerfoodeater 06/05/2011, 6:47pm PDT
No mention of the sex reference? That one was a gimme by TAFKAM 06/05/2011, 8:34pm PDT
People didn't make a big enough deal about Fantastic Mr Fox by Fullofkittens 06/05/2011, 7:05pm PDT
Re: People didn't make a big enough deal about Fantastic Mr Fox by TAFKAM 06/05/2011, 8:45pm PDT
This is a lot of responsibility, and I hope that we don't let you down. by Souffle of Pain 06/05/2011, 9:22pm PDT
Phantasm 2 by Mischief Maker 06/05/2011, 10:21pm PDT
The first Phantasm was slow, but rarely boring. Thumbs up! by Jerry Whorebach 06/05/2011, 11:57pm PDT
Re: The first Phantasm was slow, but rarely boring. Thumbs up! by laudablepuss 06/06/2011, 3:33pm PDT
I've never seen Harper either, but the poster is making me want to pretty bad. by Jerry Whorebach 06/07/2011, 6:39pm PDT
Re: never seen Harper either, but the poster is making me want to pretty bad. by Tansin A. Darcos (TDARCOS) 06/29/2012, 11:36am PDT
I think I used that exact torrent. Great minds? by Jerry Whorebach 07/01/2012, 4:42am PDT
I showed my kid Phantasm, and he thought it was a comedy. He's 9. NT by Flack 06/07/2011, 9:23am PDT
Does he own an Amiga? Is he willing to sell? NT by Ice Cream Jonsey 06/07/2011, 11:04pm PDT
My kid, or the tall man? NT by Flack 06/09/2011, 8:30am PDT
The Tall Man steals Amigas, crushes them down, and turns them into loveseats. NT by Mischief Ice Cream Man 06/09/2011, 10:23am PDT
Re: Phantasm 2 by TAFKAM 06/07/2011, 7:40pm PDT
Art School Confidential by fabio 06/06/2011, 7:28am PDT
What did you think of Ghost World NT by Vested Id 06/06/2011, 10:46pm PDT
It was good, but ASC was funnier NT by fabio 06/07/2011, 6:28am PDT
Ghost World was about alienation in general rather than a particular subculture NT by Jessica Alba 11/28/2011, 10:34am PST
A lot of time is spent on this particular subculture though. NT by Coon Chicken Inn 11/29/2011, 6:21am PST
The example clip fucked up Malkovitches' position for the cutaways. NT by Is the whole film this amatuer? 06/06/2011, 11:26pm PDT
John McClane's shirt changed color halfway through Diehard NT by fabio 06/07/2011, 6:26am PDT
Re: Art School Confidential by hateful beast 06/12/2011, 9:48pm PDT
The Men Who Stare At Goats by Hans Clastorp 06/07/2011, 6:05pm PDT
Also: "A Serious Man." NT by Hans Clastorp 06/07/2011, 6:09pm PDT
Moon NT by Zowie Bowie 06/07/2011, 6:19pm PDT
+1, just watch it, do not watch any of the trailers. by Fullofkittens 06/07/2011, 8:29pm PDT
I agree with this man. NT by Souffle of Pain 06/07/2011, 9:47pm PDT
Sherlock and Spartacus: Blood and Sand by Mr. Kool 06/07/2011, 7:07pm PDT
The Way of the Gun by Jerry Whorebach 06/07/2011, 7:16pm PDT
I probably could've done a better job of selling you on The Way of the Gun :( by Jerry Whorebach 06/07/2011, 10:31pm PDT
correction [spoiler] by Ray of Light 08/01/2011, 2:08am PDT
Doomsday was Horrible by Dave The Cannibal 06/08/2011, 8:09pm PDT
So underrated, you're underrating it right now! P( <---eyepatch over bionic eye by Jerry Whorebach 06/08/2011, 9:58pm PDT
You are the worst poster here. by Zsenijeim 06/09/2011, 4:06am PDT
And by 'worst' you surely mean 'best' NT by ...n'est-ce pas, you fat cunt? 06/09/2011, 6:14am PDT
The Bizarro Irony Award for the entire history of Caltrops goes to by fabio 06/09/2011, 8:18am PDT
Re: The Bizarro Irony Award for the entire history of Caltrops goes to by Souffle of Pain 06/09/2011, 9:42am PDT
Fortinbras doesn't hate the Creexuls by motherfuckerfoodeater 06/09/2011, 2:33pm PDT
*Beep* NT by Ator Detector 06/09/2011, 8:40am PDT
Beyond The Valley Of The Dolls by Fullofkittens 06/07/2011, 8:48pm PDT
trailer by Fullofkittens 06/07/2011, 8:55pm PDT
JCVD NT by E. L. Koba 06/08/2011, 6:48pm PDT
The trailer for this looked cool, and then I never bothered to see it. by motherfuckerfoodeater 06/08/2011, 11:00pm PDT
Yes - it's not for everyone but I loved it, and in a non-sarcastic way. by E. L. Koba 06/11/2011, 3:45pm PDT
I really enjoyed it too NT by Worm, a poster at caltrops 06/11/2011, 4:07pm PDT
Fallen NT by Horrible Gelatinous Blob 06/11/2011, 12:49pm PDT
In Bruges. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. by Gutsby 06/11/2011, 2:57pm PDT
Re: TAFKAM sitrep and under-rated movie thread. by MissCheerio 07/10/2011, 2:08pm PDT
"When having sex with a woman, do you find yourself preoccupied with thoughts of NT by dicks and semen?" 07/10/2011, 2:28pm PDT
Re: TAFKAM sitrep and under-rated movie thread. by Souffle of Pain 07/10/2011, 2:49pm PDT
Re: TAFKAM sitrep and under-rated movie thread. by MissCheerio 07/11/2011, 9:22am PDT
Re: TAFKAM sitrep and under-rated movie thread. by Souffle of Pain 07/11/2011, 10:01am PDT
This is an extarbags dilemma if ever I heard one. by I liked the old Mysterio better. 07/11/2011, 2:26pm PDT
Re: This is an extarbags dilemma if ever I heard one. by MissCheerio 07/11/2011, 10:39pm PDT
Re: This is an extarbags dilemma if ever I heard one. by Kensington Expert Louse 8.0 07/11/2011, 10:43pm PDT
All the talk about that "Catherine" game made me think of this thread. by Mischief Maker 08/01/2011, 12:17am PDT
Were the Dr. Phil credits still playing when you came up with that one? NT by Mischief Maker 07/10/2011, 5:48pm PDT
She's cheating, so I doubt she has much sex with the husband anyway. NT by Last 07/12/2011, 8:39am PDT
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