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by McMoo 12/18/2007, 8:02pm PST |
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At age 28 I decided to take up skateboarding - never had the opportunity as a kid because I grew up in a corn field and there was nothing but gravel within 5 miles.
Mrs McMoo bought me a skateboard from Zellers because we had a conversation about how I'd like to be able to do RAD TRICKS and stuff. It had a giant eyeball on it, and all the edges of the board curved upwards, presumably to allow for maximum gnarliness.
Every night after work I would skate down the mile and a quarter to the stop sign and back. Our place is out in the country: the road is paved but is extremely rough, I'm not sure if the board was terrible or the road surface was preventing me from building up any momentum but it was hard work. It was also important to watch for cars traveling at 120 kilometers per hour, because you know: paved road in the country. My balance did improve, however and I only wiped out a few times.
Then came the tricks, or maybe just the ollie, or maybe just trying to ollie and the board squirts away when you try to snap it down and you rip your nutsack open in an involuntary splits position. After that I tried ollie-ing on the lawn, which made me feel like a total pussy (because i was). Maximum height - 2 inches.
The end came as I was skateboarding over a fairly smooth piece of road and unbeknown to me, my shoelace became untied. The shoelace then wrapped around the wheel; causing my foot to become fastened to the skateboard while at the same time causing the skateboard to come to an immediate halt. The speed at which I went from standing to smashing into the road was incredible.
The skateboard is now in my basement. |
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Skate (360) by Fussbett 12/16/2007, 9:14pm PST 
Re: Skate (360) by motherfuckerfoodeater 12/16/2007, 9:28pm PST
I didn't like any of the hair options, so I went extreme in the other direction. by Fussbett 12/16/2007, 10:05pm PST
12.16.07 BMMX says: this looks faked. NT by Fortinbras 12/17/2007, 5:32pm PST
That would be bombMexico by Captain Obvious 12/17/2007, 7:25pm PST
Then someone should tell the dumb motherfucker that Bomb and Mexico have vowels NT by Fortinbras 12/17/2007, 7:39pm PST
Wow, that's sassy! by Captain Obvious 12/17/2007, 8:00pm PST
snap :( NT by Fortinbras 12/17/2007, 8:10pm PST
Don't you try to place me at the scene! NT by Semen 12/17/2007, 8:24pm PST
Thank god, I was concerned he was implying I was a hermaphrodite NT by Fortinbras 12/17/2007, 8:36pm PST
I thought that part might confuse YOU. NT by Captain Obvious 12/17/2007, 8:49pm PST
oh NT by Fortinbras 12/17/2007, 8:49pm PST
SNAP? NT by ? 12/19/2007, 4:13pm PST
just oh NT by Fortinbras 12/19/2007, 4:37pm PST
Yeah skating games, psh yawn, who gives a SHIT. by Jhoh Creebul, Witch Toucher O_O 12/18/2007, 7:15am PST
Welcome! (Rad) NT by Fussbett 12/18/2007, 9:45am PST
How did I miss this until today? I almost ditched work to go out and buy it NT by Entropy Stew 12/18/2007, 3:49pm PST
Welcome! (Gnarly) NT by Fussbett 12/18/2007, 5:16pm PST
I looked at the clock and it was 2 am by Entropy Stew 12/19/2007, 10:15am PST
parking garage by Entropy Stew 12/19/2007, 6:43pm PST
A skateboarding story by McMoo 12/18/2007, 8:02pm PST
Older people shouldn't try new things, they can hurt themselves. NT by Jerry Whorebach 12/18/2007, 9:09pm PST
WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH VIDEO GAME REVIEWS? NT by bombMexico 12/18/2007, 9:26pm PST
Real life skateboarding: negative! by McMoo NT by Jhoh Creebul, Witch Toucher O_O 12/18/2007, 10:51pm PST
Attn ICJ: Can we get a forum for this? NT by Entropy Stew 12/19/2007, 6:38pm PST
Thank you, good sir NT by Entropy Stew 12/19/2007, 10:04pm PST
::fingerguns NT by Ice Cream Jonsey 12/20/2007, 12:48am PST
goonskate user improved on my McTwist by Fussbett 12/22/2007, 4:57pm PST
Re: Skate (360) or die by bombMexico 12/24/2007, 3:43am PST
You should avoid Skate. Flip one controller over in quiet submission. by Fussbett 12/24/2007, 4:32pm PST
Mentioning vgchartz on GAF is grounds for a ban, coornncobb... PIPE. NT by Jerry Whorebach 12/24/2007, 11:32pm PST
NPD reacts to vgchartz by Fussbett 12/25/2007, 3:27am PST
Re: You should avoid Skate. Flip one controller over in quiet submission. by bombMexico 12/25/2007, 4:37am PST
There are just bad challenges. by Worm 12/25/2007, 7:28am PST
*can skip one or two NT by Worm 12/25/2007, 7:32am PST
Re: You should avoid Skate. Flip one controller over in quiet submission. by Entropy Stew 12/25/2007, 5:56am PST
Re: You should avoid Skate. Flip one controller over in quiet submission. by Fussbett 12/25/2007, 6:07am PST
FOUR OF THEM WOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooo by Entropy Stew 12/25/2007, 6:20am PST
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