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| My first prostitute. by Quentin Beck 08/27/2007, 7:02pm PDT | ||||
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| I had been meaning to have sex with a prostitute but I was worried about the guilt. I eventually made the (not so conscious) decision that if there were enough mitigating factors, I could defend the decision and retain my moral grace. Also, I was having 13 year old rape wank fantasies so it’s not like I was a fantastic person who’d be uncharacteristically blemished by the whole thing.
I wasn’t sure how to go about buying sex. There were definitely degrees of culpability. I wanted my decision to be a spur of the moment one that was heavily influenced by peer pressure. I felt that would be much more defensible to any future wife or partner. So! I promised I would buy a Korean friend a prostitute for his birthday in the hope that he would either take me along for the ride, and, I could be all “Oh, well, I’m here so I might as well…” or he would reciprocate and later buy me a prostitute for my birthday (surprise!), and I could be all like, “Are you kidding?! What am I supposed to do with a prostitute, you crazy bastard?! Oh, well!…” That night, during his celebrations, the birthday boy told us about this university town 30 minutes away that had two Polytechs that taught fashion, art and other girl subjects. He said that it had the best brothels because all the whores were young, fashionable, greedy students. His talk was turning a lot of people on! My gay flatmate was key here because I guess he felt a bit left out by all this so he said he’d have a crack at a whore to see what all the fuss was about. This made the whole thing seem like an adventure and diminished the last bits seediness that were keeping guys like myself in check. “Yes, let’s all have a ‘go’ at a whore! It will be HILARIOUS!” The only other white guy present had picked up a beautiful girl legitimately, much to all of our disgust, and had taken her home. So we had also taken that to heart and we decided to totally outdo that motherfucker by whoring. We would whore that guy a lesson for running off from the guys! So, on the face of it, there were all these more acceptable motivations at work, and they may seem pretty far fetched now, but when we were drunk, they were very acceptable. When we got there, the first group of adjuma’s denied us because some of us were white. The second group of adjumas around the corner did the same! We couldn’t find anyone else! The birthday boy went into a convenience store and was yelling at the boy there to tell us where the rest of the whores were and it was very hilarious. Fortunately, he was feeling really embarrassed about talking up this place as a whore paradise and we travel all this fucking way and get shot down by a couple of mean old bitches. He pushed over a gum rack and the gay was smashing bottles outside and if I was worried this thing was going to fall apart before it started. The gay was going off the whole idea, and this was important because I had kept telling him I wasn’t going to fuck a whore unless he did too so that he would believe I was motivated chiefly by the dare factor. There was also this hardcore Christian virgin who’d tagged along with us. He was a friend of the birthday boy and I’m not sure whether he was there by choice or because he was hoping to split the bill for the taxi ride home. He kept falling asleep. Eventually the birthday boy managed to convince the first group of adjumas to let us fuck. I paid the adjumas before we went in. It was $40 a fuck! The birthday boy went in the far room, the gay the middle room, and me the room closest to the entrance by the adjumas. I turned the TV on so that I would be doing something when the whore came in and I could be, like, “Oh! Hi! What a surprise” kind of thing. I found Seinfeld on a channel. I just kind of stared at the TV though because I was a quite drunk and because I had other things on my mind. I can’t remember what episode it was, but when the theme music played between ad breaks, it seemed so surreal and I thought I would never be able to look at Seinfeld the same way again (although I have and it just reminded me that George is annoying). I was very tense. After 10 minutes, I heard a whore arrive! But she went into one of the other rooms, or was that just one of the guys going for a piss? I think I was relieved? I waited for five minutes. I was sure I had been cheated and wondered how I could break the news to the birthday boy so he could argue with the ladies and get my money back. I texted the gay guy. Seinfeld finished! What the FUCK could I do now?!? I can’t remember what I did. Probably just watched ads. She arrived! I was surprised because I was sure I was cheated and my heart was broken. She was wearing a vest and looked good and young! Wow! I don’t think she said anything. I thought I’d stay quiet and look cool. She turned the TV off which upset me because I wanted to turn the volume down and fuck in the light of its picture instead of the dim red light. She got undressed immediately which surprised me. She was well dressed and I would have liked to fondle her through her clothes and undressed her myself. I guess I expected that everything would go my way with whores and I could order them to do whatever I wanted. This didn’t disappoint me at the time but disappoints me now that I think about it! She told me to get undressed. This worried me because it was very, very cold outside so I’d thrown on a lot of things that didn’t match so well. I can remember what I wore! I’m very self conscious about the way I dress. I tried to keep my jersey on but she told me (by humming and charading) to get totally undressed and I remember wondering at the time (and now too) why the fuck she cares about how naked I get? Perhaps the wool would chafe. The girl’s hands were cold because she’d just been scootered in through the cold. This is what I was thinking as she sucked my dick. The only interesting thing about the sex that I remember is that she laughed when I tried to kiss her! In retrospect, this could have been because she must have been short and I am very tall so bending to accommodate could have looked amusing; or, the stinking soju on my breath would have been repulsive; or, you’re not supposed to kiss whores, stupid! It’s just like everyone says! (although that’s not true: in my experience, about one in five whores kiss (probably more if I were daring enough to try more often (and I probably would be if bitches like this didn’t laugh in my face))). After I came, she took a facecloth out of her bag, went to the bathroom, wet it with warm water and gently cleaned my dick. So good! We both got dressed. I opened my wallet and gave her everything left in there (about $12). She wasn’t very thankful. The guys told me that was a very weird thing to do, but I thought I was doing that whole American tipping thing (guys!!!). I can’t remember if I left before she did and I also can’t remember what happened when we passed the adjumas, but I do remember all the guys were out there waiting for me. The gay hadn’t fucked anybody but had instead waited with the Christian guy in one of the spare rooms taking photos of cumstains and cheesy framed pictures. The birthday boy told me he had trouble getting an erection because of his drunkenness. The taxi ride home was very normal. The next day, flush with how easy sex was to buy, I hinted at my whoring to my Korean girlfriend. She said she’d seen the pictures on the gay’s [Korean equivalent to myspace] and assumed as much. She gave me this cute knowing smile and seemed to respect me more and this made me feel really great about the whole thing! Although, that particular bitch eventually drove me to the most expensive whore I ever fucked (as her punishment) but that’s another story! |
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