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| Re: Net Wank by Mysterio 10/28/2004, 7:15pm PDT | ||||
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Mysterio wrote:Mysterio wrote:It's Onan. Onan, onanism, you mouth-breathing degenerate. Cheers cunt. Turns out Oman's an arab country (who'd've guessed?), which reminds me of a terrible wank I once had. I was watching the 700 club and Pat Robertson was telling a story about a pretty Christian maid who worked for a wealthy Muslim family in Afghanistan. Because she was so pretty, one of the sons wanted to marry her despite her lowly position in society, but only on the grounds that she convert to the Muslim faith. When she refused, he and his brothers took her upstairs with a hand gun and raped her. When their father found out she'd 'had sex' with the boys (they didn't say how), she was thrown in jail. One of the boys visited her in jail and raped her again in her cell. The jailer saw, and once the boy'd gone, he had a rape himself. So, awkwardly, I'm sitting in front of the 700 club with an erection. Any talk of pretty Afghan girls brings to mind that chick with the haunting eyes on the cover of that National Geographic, and I'd been meaning to jerk off over her for a while, so I take the Nat G and head upstairs for a quick and dirty rape fantasy into an old tee-shirt. It was terrible, though. Pretty as she is, her look's more than a little off-putting. I might have similar troubles if I ever tried to jerk off over the Mona Lisa. I came, of course, but that was more due to imagining her legs flapping around as she resisted my rape than any buzz I got off her pretty face. Afterwards, her eyes made me feel like shit for even thinking about raping her, which I think was the moral of Pat Robertson's news story anyway, so didn't things work out nicely! |
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Net Wank by 10/27/2004, 5:37pm PDT  Re: Net Wank by 10/27/2004, 5:49pm PDT 'Twas me! NT by 10/27/2004, 5:50pm PDT SUBTITLE: Expert schools n00b NT by 10/27/2004, 6:45pm PDT Re: Net Wank by 10/28/2004, 7:15pm PDT Also on net wanks... by 10/28/2004, 7:19pm PDT |
