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by Ice Cream Jonsey Yesterday, 8:26am PST |
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I have been trying out NHL23 for the PS4 lately. I had to turn the music completely off. They went out of their way to find the most obnoxious would-be jock rock shit imaginable. I don't even know how these songs get made. I don't know who can stand performing them with the necessary takes to get them finished. I wish I could articulate what I hate about them. It's like if the WWF version of "Land of 1,000 Dances" was re-imagined by broccoli-headed pop "punkers", all of whom are terminally online and essentially (though they don't know it) killing time until Instagram stories about how they had bad sex with their groupies start coming out by NHL27. Rape? Sexual assault? Just make the music better. Nobody is trying to lock up the guys behind "Walk This Way."
(The rest of the game is extra in all the ways that I wish it wouldn't be, with fucking dark patterns about signing up for EA's shitwad online service. I really wish someone involved with the game would go catch an NHL game in Arizona in February or Buffalo halfway through one of their patented 13 game losing streaks and maybe adjust the fucking crowd noise, too, downwards without me having to do it.) |
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