Forum Overview :: Peter Molyneux's The Movies
 
Joss Whedon permafucked Black Widow when he gave her those tiny little Glocks. by Brody Wilder 09/01/2022, 4:26pm PDT
laudablepuss wrote:

But worse than that is the original girl superhero of the MCU isn't there: Black Widow. The MCU fucked her over so hard. She should have had her own movie by 2013 at the latest, and now they kill her off before the great big all girl show. :(

She's supposed to be a Soviet superagent. Depending on the continuity, she might be a hundred years old. She doesn't have any super powers, she's just the ultimate badass. She's the Punisher if he joined the KGB instead of the NYPD. I haven't seen The Avengers in a decade or so, but I'm pretty sure there's a scene where they're all flying into New York on a C-130 (or whatever the VFX house had a model for). That would've been a perfect moment for her to start loading her guns, an RPD if they wanted to play up the Soviet angle, or an FN Minimi if they wanted to be practical. More importantly, the comic Black Widow would've definitely had an M79 grenade launcher on her hip, if she was planning to go up against huge alien monsters.

I could imagine the scene as I watched the movie. Tony Stark would've seen her loading a bandolier, and patronizingly informed her that at the close range they were going to be fighting, her grenades wouldn't have a chance to arm themselves - it takes a certain number of rotations as they fly through the air, etc. But Black Widow would've kept on loading, while Captain America glared at her disapprovingly. He would've informed Tony that those weren't grenades; the red ones were flechettes, and the white ones were Willy Peter - both major violators of the Geneva Convention. In the battle of New York, she would've turned more than a few Parademons into Vietnam-era war crimes. Now that's a fucking solo movie.
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Let's talk about everything wrong with Endgame! by laudablepuss 08/23/2022, 12:24pm PDT NEW
    Re: Let's talk about everything wrong with Endgame! by laudablepuss 08/23/2022, 2:14pm PDT NEW
    If you are gonna hunt dragon balls you bring dragon radar NT by Bulma 08/23/2022, 3:11pm PDT NEW
        Re: If you are gonna hunt dragon balls you bring dragon radar by laudablepuss 08/23/2022, 6:09pm PDT NEW
    I was mostly bothered by how dumb they made Thanos’ goals by blackwater 08/24/2022, 10:16pm PDT NEW
        Re: I was mostly bothered by how dumb they made Thanos’ goals by Gaige Grosskreutz 08/24/2022, 10:45pm PDT NEW
        Re: I was mostly bothered by how dumb they made Thanos’ goals by laudablepuss 08/30/2022, 9:35am PDT NEW
            Marvel movie effects suck because of horrible working conditions. by Mischief Maker 08/30/2022, 12:11pm PDT NEW
                ABC NT by Always Be C 08/30/2022, 12:51pm PDT NEW
                Maybe you meant this as a reply to Roop, because I don't agree NT by laudablepuss 08/30/2022, 6:12pm PDT NEW
            Re: I was mostly bothered by how dumb they made Thanos’ goals by Bupo Wingnut 08/30/2022, 8:46pm PDT NEW
                I thought The View was just about Joy and Whoopie dunking on Meghan McCain. NT by Mischief Maker 08/30/2022, 9:25pm PDT NEW
                    No one tell him about Joy NT by or, Whoopi? 08/31/2022, 4:02pm PDT NEW
                No, gross, that was not an Agent Smith thing NT by laudablepuss 08/30/2022, 10:41pm PDT NEW
            I didn't remember who Pepper or Black Widow was, hence wasn't outraged by blackwater 08/31/2022, 3:22pm PDT NEW
                Re: I didn't remember who Pepper or Black Widow was, hence wasn't outraged by Mysterio 08/31/2022, 9:50pm PDT NEW
                    Alcoholism would have made that movie tolerable by blackwater 09/01/2022, 9:46am PDT NEW
                        We already have an Endgame thread! by Brody Wilder 09/01/2022, 11:28am PDT NEW
                            PS: In the comics, Rogue with Carol's powers was a better character than Carol. by Brody Wilder 09/01/2022, 11:38am PDT NEW
                                That's my Rogue. Blanche DuBois meets Leon from Resident Evil 4. NT by Brody Wilder 09/01/2022, 11:45am PDT NEW
                                    Wait I meant Devereaux not DuBois. Achoholism isn't all fun and games :( NT by Brody Wilder 09/01/2022, 11:46am PDT NEW
                            I saw like... half of these movies, and am a bit embarrassed to admit that. by blackwater 09/01/2022, 4:28pm PDT NEW
                        I maintain that these are good and worthwhile movies for the most part NT by laudablepuss 09/01/2022, 1:06pm PDT NEW
            Joss Whedon permafucked Black Widow when he gave her those tiny little Glocks. by Brody Wilder 09/01/2022, 4:26pm PDT NEW
    The CGI makes me want to want to vomit. I honestly find all of it unwatchable. by Roop 08/27/2022, 12:43am PDT NEW
    I think Endgame is fine. They should've stopped with Endgame though. by Fullofkittens 09/02/2022, 6:59am PDT NEW
        Yes, I am also excited to see by Olivia Wilde's sophomore effort 09/02/2022, 9:36am PDT NEW
            Sorry, this was harsh, I'm kinda curious what she brings to the table by Seems like an interesting person 09/02/2022, 11:32am PDT NEW
                I thought Andrew Tate was king of the incels. NT by Mischief Maker 09/02/2022, 12:41pm PDT NEW
                    Are there people that self-identify as incels? NT by Fullofkittens 09/02/2022, 12:46pm PDT NEW
                        Yeah, it's a self-abuse community/death cult: by Mischief Maker 09/02/2022, 1:04pm PDT NEW
                            We like genuinely like the costumes. NT by Mysterios 09/02/2022, 1:14pm PDT NEW
                            No one watches your Contrapoints vids, and s/he was cancelled anyway by O-Bomb 09/02/2022, 1:18pm PDT NEW
        Yes surely they will quit making these movies that are making them millions of $ by blackwater 09/02/2022, 12:01pm PDT NEW
        Re: I think Endgame is fine. They should've stopped with Endgame though. by Ice Cream Jonsey 09/02/2022, 1:10pm PDT NEW
            All the streaming companies are incredibly metrics-driven and will cancel shows by blackwater 09/03/2022, 7:49pm PDT NEW
                So like us NT by Google 09/04/2022, 6:08pm PDT NEW
                    Yup. They are the N and the G in FAANG NT by blackwater 09/05/2022, 2:39pm PDT NEW
                        Oops, I wrote "streaming companies". Only Netflix is the N in FAANG by blackwater 09/05/2022, 3:17pm PDT NEW
 
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