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by Mischief Maker 04/07/2011, 6:04pm PDT |
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This game is an even worse tease then Galactic Civilizations 2. The one good part of the game is the Tetris minigame where you fit components into your hull squares visually, rather than limiting things with abstract tonnage numbers. Except weapons, they're pretty much fixed for type, you just choose between the less powerful single shot, or the less accurate double shot. As for the crew spots, there's pretty much a "best" NPC for each slot, so its just a matter of finding them all instead of a min-maxing fest. Plus your choices of crew members start out with some fat dropout who brings a knife to a laserfight and your idiot sister. What am I, Janeway? Customization doesn't change what the ships look like at all, and they're pretty much all primitive low-poly PSX-quality models.
Fleet combat is literally one-dimensional. Your starfleet acts as a single unit with aggregate stats. You move toward the enemy, let off a volley once they're in range, then run out of their range while your weapons recharge. Rinse and repeat. The game tries to mix things up by adding a basic rock-paper-scissors system of attack styles, but in practice it's like playing against an opponent who only picks Rock or Scissors, I never ever caught the AI in dodge mode with the normal shot. Crew combat zero dimensional, just play RPS and let the stats fall where they may. The main thing that makes new players think the game is hard is the shitty HUD system. You're supposed to shoot front row ships first, but they're not listed in order of placement like you would have thought, they're randomly arranged on the HUD and the hashmarks at the bottom of their icon tells you what row they're in.
The random number generator is very screwy for generating random encounters. Sometimes you can fly all the way across the solar system with nary a peep, then you can get attacked 3 times on a run between just 2 planets. The money you get for slaughtering hundreds of pirate ships and presumably thousands of crewmembers is very very little.
The controls are touchscreen-only, but all you're doing is pushing buttons, at max about 8 of them. The worst of both worlds!
So the gameplay is crap, what about the plot? The setting is the future, one where retards reign supreme. The very first boss is the dictator of your homeworld who forbids any space travel. Why? Because he's too old to go space traveling himself and he's jealous of the youngsters. God bless the wonderful cultural wellspring that is Anime.
Zseni would love this game because at all times it is made clear that pirates are the dominant military force in the galaxy and the one thing they're busy doing is rape. Pirate bases are filled with sex slaves. A waitress you're trying to recruit into your crew is kidnapped, raped, and then gets a bomb surgically implanted in her to try and kill you. Even the Bishonen in your crew nearly gets raped by pirates who mistake him for a girl at first, then decide he's close enough. Rape, rape rape, rape, rape!
The main character is being monitored by aliens from afar and one of the first things they do is implant the memory into his brain that the girl they're using as their spy is his beloved sister. So he takes her onto his crew and all sorts of creepiness ensues because the main character's "sister" REALLY makes it clear she wants to jump his bones and the rest of the crew is constantly saying things like, "You two sure act more like boyfriend and girlfriend than brother and sister, are you sure you're related???" while the main character is all, "No that's gross, dudes, she's my sister." It was right around this point that I quit the game. The gameplay was shallow and boring and the plot was actively punishing me for advancing it.
Star Fox Command, aka. "Help the furries find true love" is less creepy and a better Space Opera than Infinite Space. Don't buy the hype. |
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Top 10 and Bottom 5 DS Games partial draft by Mischief Maker 04/06/2011, 2:56pm PDT 
#3: Elite Beat Agents <---- fixed NT by Horrible Gelatinous Blob 04/06/2011, 3:31pm PDT 
Worse than Spirit Tracks? NT by Mischief Maker 04/06/2011, 4:14pm PDT 
I kid. by Mischief Maker 04/06/2011, 4:19pm PDT 
Tell me more about Infinite Space. by Gutsby 04/07/2011, 5:07pm PDT 
Re: Tell me more about Infinite Space. by Mischief Maker 04/07/2011, 6:04pm PDT 
Spirit Tracks has been at 10% completion since release week. by Last 04/13/2011, 9:43am PDT 
How about Children of Mana? by skippy 04/06/2011, 4:37pm PDT 
Scribblenauts shut out! (UPSET) NT by Fullofkittens 04/06/2011, 4:53pm PDT 
Re: Top 10 and Bottom 5 DS Games partial draft by fabio 04/12/2011, 8:41pm PDT 
Re: Top 10 and Bottom 5 DS Games partial draft by Mischief Maker 04/13/2011, 4:28am PDT 
AW2 should have won best DS strategy game then =( NT by fabio 04/13/2011, 10:16am PDT 
worst strategy game: Puzzle Quest Galactrix by fabio 04/13/2011, 10:49am PDT 
TWEWY ate my fucking life for a month. by Last 04/13/2011, 9:36am PDT 
I don't currently have an article scheduled for Sunday. How happy are you with by Ice Cream Jonsey 05/03/2011, 8:33pm PDT 
Re: Top 10 and Bottom 5 DS Games partial draft by Mischief Maker 05/04/2011, 8:40am PDT 
Fixed Bad Link 3rd Draft by Mischief Maker 05/04/2011, 8:52am PDT 
FINAL DRAFT: Good to go. by Mischief Maker 05/04/2011, 4:17pm PDT 
ACES! I am gurgling with pleasure. It'll be up Sunday night. NT by Ice Cream Jonsey 05/05/2011, 9:34am PDT 
Re: ACES! I am gurgling with pleasure. It'll be up Sunday night. by Ice Cream Jonsey 05/05/2011, 9:45am PDT 
Re: ACES! I am gurgling with pleasure. It'll be up Sunday night. by Mischief Maker 05/06/2011, 1:58am PDT 
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