Forum Overview :: Forza Motorsport 3
 
Re: My Ideal Career Mode by Ice Cream Jonsey 08/27/2009, 7:56pm PDT
Jerry Whorebach wrote:

My ideal career mode would just be a big list of races that you could do in any order you want. Once you selected a race, they would show you a list of all the cars that qualify and let you pick whichever one you want without having to buy it. There would be no license tests or tests of any kind. There would still be a garage, but it would just be a place to store cars you customized yourself. If you finished every race in the game in first place there would be a screen with a phone number on it you could call and a woman would have sex with you. To stop people from putting the number on the internet it would be a different telephone number each time.


All right. The trick is to propose this to someone in upper management who doesn't know you that well and just got a new phone. They'll space out almost immediately, come back to the meeting when you say the phrase, "buy it," drift back towards their gAndroid when they realize that you aren't really demanding that they approve a req, and then assume you've thought everything in as much detail as the randomly generated phone number.

Anyway, that's gonna be the chief mechanic of the Caltrops Xbox indie game unless E.L. Koba finishes SpaceFag: it will be a drving thing that will encourage you to call a phone number during gameplay, and the phone numbers listed will be the cells of actual forum posters. The phone sex won't be completely guaranteed (two of our more conservative posters are put off by talking about things in such lurid detail, especially for the region 4 release) but you'll stand a better chance of it than you would when Nois2a is eventually ported by whatever tireless goblins port it to every other item with a diode. The new camera lets you gesture ("d3d_conjure") up code, so I don't even think it will be that tough to finish. Figure 11/17/09? Nothing else will be hitting the market that day.

With some luck and an inspiring round of irony, once it's finished for the 360 Jonathan Blow can promise to then fail to gift it to you.


the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!
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Turn 10 hard at work ruining Forza 3 by Jerry Whorebach 08/26/2009, 8:00am PDT NEW
    anyone who has driven a car in their life wouldn't care about racing games by Weyoun Voidbringer 08/26/2009, 9:03am PDT NEW
        How about people who have ever had sex, do you know anything about them? NT by Do they still care about porn? 08/26/2009, 9:07am PDT NEW
            how about people who display obsessive behavior and watch snuff films? NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 08/26/2009, 9:32am PDT NEW
            I'm driving a car and having sex RIGHT NOW by Comic Book Stuntman 08/26/2009, 10:44am PDT NEW
                The rumors you heard about me driving two cars at once while having sex and by Ben "Mookie 'Fatal1ty' Spiccoli" Th 08/26/2009, 10:49am PDT NEW
                wow you get to actually drive a car? COOL MAN WHAT KIND OF CAR NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 08/26/2009, 11:17am PDT NEW
            Hahahahahahaha by HT 09/16/2025, 6:11am PDT NEW
        Get in the fastest car and floor it and you win (this is not a sport). NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 08/26/2009, 1:23pm PDT NEW
    The Honda Fit is the official car of Qt3 by Fussbett 08/26/2009, 10:21am PDT NEW
        sweatpants, pajama pants, they look about the same :( NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 08/26/2009, 10:31am PDT NEW
            Left wing, right wing, they taste the same to me. 8) NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 08/26/2009, 1:25pm PDT NEW
        I'm going Fiesta (it's like there's a party in your car and everyone's invited) by Jerry Whorebach 08/26/2009, 11:26am PDT NEW
            ...for the 10 minutes until you upgrade your car (if it's longer, throw game out NT by Fussbett 08/26/2009, 2:16pm PDT NEW
                Well obviously, it's not like I'm going to drive one car a day for 400 days. by Jerry Whorebach 08/26/2009, 5:35pm PDT NEW
        why... pay more for pants... elastic... NT by up with pod people, eating a gun 08/26/2009, 2:38pm PDT NEW
    Forza 3: Still Not Burnout NT by Horrible Gelatinous Blob 08/26/2009, 2:45pm PDT NEW
        case closed NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 08/26/2009, 3:42pm PDT NEW
            bar open by gruman 08/27/2009, 11:17am PDT NEW
                Someone took the best part of Shenmue and made a whole game out of it? NT by Worm 08/27/2009, 11:35am PDT NEW
    I have some questions. by Ice Cream Jonsey 08/26/2009, 10:56pm PDT NEW
        A lot of people don't realize this, but Forza Motorsport is a sports game. by Jerry Whorebach 08/27/2009, 4:40am PDT NEW
            And you can't intentionally crash your car into other cars and kill the drivers? by Creexuls, a monster >:3 08/27/2009, 4:48am PDT NEW
                Oh, I barely scratched the surface of what's wrong with Forza. by Jerry Whorebach 08/27/2009, 5:03am PDT NEW
            Re: A lot of people don't realize this, but Forza Motorsport is a sports game. by Ice Cream Jonsey 08/27/2009, 7:01am PDT NEW
                B-b-but that's the part I DISlike! by Jerry Whorebach 08/27/2009, 8:17am PDT NEW
                    My Ideal Career Mode by Jerry Whorebach 08/27/2009, 8:52am PDT NEW
                        Did you ever try GRID? (Not that it fixes all of the problems) You can rent it NT by (Well not YOU but someone can) FSBT 08/27/2009, 1:29pm PDT NEW
                            No, I heard it was too much like Nicole Kidman. by Jerry Whorebach 08/30/2009, 2:21pm PDT NEW
                                It was cheap so I bought it anyway :( by Jerry Whorebach 08/30/2009, 4:53pm PDT NEW
                                    At one point you get to hire teammates by Fussbett 08/30/2009, 5:52pm PDT NEW
                                        I thought of another thing GRID has in common with Nicole Kidman by Jerry Whorebach 08/30/2009, 6:02pm PDT NEW
                                            they aren't working no more NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 08/30/2009, 7:04pm PDT NEW
                                        Speaking of teammates, this game really needs a "back off and let me win" button by Jerry Whorebach 09/01/2009, 9:19pm PDT NEW
                                            shake n bake, if you ain't first you're last, etc by Weyoun Voidbringer 09/01/2009, 10:17pm PDT NEW
                                    It turns out Primus was wrong NT by I need clarification 08/30/2009, 10:09pm PDT NEW
                                        Re: It turns out Primus was wrong by Creexuls, a monster >:3 08/30/2009, 10:33pm PDT NEW
                        My ideal career mode: One of the Burnout games. NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 08/27/2009, 3:46pm PDT NEW
                        Re: My Ideal Career Mode by Ice Cream Jonsey 08/27/2009, 7:56pm PDT NEW
            Critics would like racing games more without so much racing in them by Jerry Whorebach 09/11/2009, 10:02pm PDT NEW
        For the Record by Forza Developer 08/27/2009, 11:30am PDT NEW
            Because I don't want my sister murdered NT by Ice Cream Jonsey 08/27/2009, 7:32pm PDT NEW
 
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