Forum Overview :: Deleted Posts :: Re: A bitter appraisal by Kab(uke) Seme

[quote name="Kab(uke) Seme"]I played the entire game rabbit punching small children in the throat, enslaving the Wookie race and causing untold levels of (futher) trauma to the the robosexual met early on. Even with my less than savory misuses of the force for fun and profit I was left with a gap, a spot teased and stoked by the half hard erection what I can only assume some second rate italy Falcon porn regular. So I am primed and oh so moist, quivering to make with the nasty, only to end up taking it in the hair by this premature ejaculator. Why? The game is too fucking afraid to go all the way with my oh so exotic self. Bioware? A few fucking taps on the ass does not make you Dominatrix sub for the day and neither does some half assed Sith wickedness. Is is so hard to render evil? It's not like there is a surfeit of material. There are force powers, exquisitely and unambigiously evil evil powers, which are never exploited to utterly unwholesome potential. i.e. depositing gallons of warm Jedi seed in the wombs of every cantina slut from Endor to Hoth. One faggy t-rex of a limp wrist wave and they'd forget all, that bun in the oven sko immaculate conception. So I assumed since the game won't allow me to go on my one Jedi Eugenics campaign they will make it up in much more insidious and cruel a fashion. Hear that? It's the Booong of Sam Rockwell pounding a gong with splenetic frenzy. And to think some of you Ladies have the temerity to bitch about the word count of the god damn fruity made up languages populating this piece of shit and not, as you should be, wondering why it isn't you're not allowed Force nudge a pregnant mother off a balcony. The most use my mind control ever saw was in being able to half the cost of some trinket a widow's dead husband left behind. Fucking half?! When did being evil become synonymous with petty extortion schemes? I can snap necks at a distance, dice to shreds an entire colony of those dirty fucking darky tuskan raiders, but still I'm forced at playing a low level Wise Guy with quests revolving around me bitch slapping the local flesh trade and junkies for my cut of the tepid action. Now I'm a neophyte to the Star Wars universe, but I'm fairly sure the whole debacle could've been far more effectively concluded with one swipe of this pulsing double headed cocklightsaber everyone seems to think is so hawt. The icing on the cake came in the form of hearing one of those 3D rendered Gabe Newell's flatulate out some Jabba-speak: 'Cree-bacca-hee-bacca-No-mind-tricks-faggot-Jedi-hee-bacca' when I decided it might be more beneficial if it suicided painfully. I can't even carve my initials in his fat ass as a healthy expression my displeasure. What a fucking crock. In conclusion the abhorrent plot coupled with the boring NWN-lite gameplay is crap. The only thing worse than realizing how faggy a species of queer these Sith were in the Republic's hey-day is knowing every reviewer can't stop going, "OMFG, this game is so sexy! Game of the year awesome #1!" No wait, worse is I spent 50 bucks hoping they might even be minutely close to reality in that assessment. [/quote]