Caltrops - Deleted Posts





	[quote name="four20"]<b>April 8, 2004:</b> I befriended Jen from class and now we're study buddies for our law exam. Jen Goode gave me her phone number and email address. What a name--- Jen Goode! Studying will be a "Goode" time; that's if I don't get distracted by the white belt worn with her low rise jeans or her blond hair and cool blue eyes! <b>April 13, 2004:</b> Hmm... I was thinking that maybe I should quit smoking next week. Perhaps next Wednesday (April 21st) I'll wake up and not smoke. I've quit before; its really quite effortless, provided your taking Zyban. That's the problem, its too easy to quit when your on Zyban. You end up not smoking (with no effort at all) for 2 weeks then have a cigarette when it wears off from drinking; yet still be able to rise the next day with no craving at all. Zyban is to cigarettes what methadone is to heroin. The problem is, I'm not taking or going to take Zyban. But damn, I take lotsa prescrip drugs anyway, maybe I won't feel too bad without the nicotine. My chances of quitting are nil. April 20th is my B-Day, so I'll smoke then, its waking up on the 21st and not smoking that will be hard. It won't last, but I should still give it a shot. Actually, its futile. You can run on the beach like a man possesed, reward yourself with food, drink water et cetera. However, nicotine is too powerful to resist. For example, if a smoker only has enough money for either lunch or cigarettes, they'll buy the cigarettes! You can fight the craving for food, but not the craving for a cigarette. Four years ago, when cigarettes were cheap, I saved $400 in four months. After all, once you break paper money (regardless of its denomination or how much change you get back) its all change from then on! Yet, I couldn't be bought! A fistfull of dollars wasn't enough to convince me to quit. There are benefits in quitting: good healthy glowing skin, smelling smoke-free, increased stamina and vigor. Its kind of stupid to smoke, but unless you also smoke, you won't understand. <b>April 17, 2004:</b> Last night, I had a chance encounter with a girl I was friends with seven years ago. Wow! She still looked as cute as she did back then. It still escapes me what color her eyes and hair are; almost like I'm caught in a spell. Hmm... dirty blonde or strawberry blonde, green eyes or blue eyes? It was through her that I got hooked on Brit Pop/Rock seven years ago. Our favorite song to dance to was "Female of the Species" by Space. I'd raise her hand over her head and twirl her around whenever we danced to the song. I'll have to call her Miss Clough because I honestly don't know how to spell her frist name. Its a simple name, but how many wasp girls have a latina sounding name like Teresa or maybe its spelled Theresa---I don't know. Well, she called me after she left Sneaky Dee's last night to see if she got (or if I gave her) the right phone number! I guess we'll be friends this summer! Maybe she'll call me at 3AM in a drunken stupor asking: "Joseph, wanna bone?" Well, seven years ago, she asked me that during a drunken phonecall. Oh yeah, for those who don't know, "Joseph" isn't my real name. My real name is "Johannes"; its German. I go by "Joe" because as a child, many people would call me "Jo-hannes". However, the name is actually pronounced "Yo-hannes". <b>April 20, 2004 (four20!):</b> In the grand scheme of things, its not bad being me. Although at times, I profoundly hate being me. However, I've been blessed with a gift; I make people (even strangers) smile! Making other people smile makes me feel like happiest guy in the world! Fine, things don't always go my way and I'm dealt a bad hand quite too often. Yet I take comfort in the fact that I have what it takes to make people to smile. Its what I do best and that's important to me. Making people smile makes me feel like a somebody! Happy 27th Birthday to me! <b>April 22, 2004:</b> It doesn't matter that I'm 27. After all, I do have the lifestyle of an unresponsible 21 yr old. The brithday revelry came to an end tonight with the passage of the last call at the bar. Rounds of Johnnie Walker, Tequila, pitchers of beer, nachos and chicken wings at Sneaky Dee's were paid for by my dear friends. A solemn late night meal with my best friend in Chinatown followed and officially ended the revelry. I live a youthful life thats filled with pleasantries! However, everyone must grow up; including me. No more meeting girls (like tonight) who recognize me and claim to know me despite (myself) having no recollection of ever meeting them. Also, no more cowardly emails or phone calls to girls days later saying "sorry, I was just really drunk that night". Yes, that's horrible. Furthermore, smoking cigarettes will also be phased out after 28 April 2004. I'm waiting for that day to quit because that's when exams will end this term. Its no sense in quitting during the stress of exams. I have profound optimism for my 27th year and all the subsequent opportunites that will come into fruition. For example, maybe Ashley Elliott is willing to trust me in regards to being roomates with her and others in September. Don't worry Ash, no grade 9 hormones from Joe! Finally finishing at U of T. Befriending strangers and becoming unlikely friends. Relentlessly doing kind acts for others et cetera. Joe boldly going where he hasn't gone before. The possibilities are endless! <b>April 27, 2004:</b> I went to Tim Horton's (a coffee shop) with my books at 10PM to study when I girl walked to my table and asked if she could sit with me (although numerous tables were vacant). That was just past 10PM, we ended up talking until 3:40AM. Jenna is a first year U of T student taking Political Science & Philosophy. We both never ran out of things to talk, laugh and whisper about. Nonchalantly (yet passionately), we talked about: porn, movies, stereotypes, corporations, prostitution, school, friendship, hopes, dreams, spite, food, pets, materialism and our personal lives. On a serious note, we both articulated our respective visons on human social life as being "nasty brutish and short". I really blundered one of my last times to study for my final exam on Wednesday (that I'm so far behind). Yeah, I really needed to study. But what should have I done? Its not like I'd say no to a fellow student who wants to sit with me. After, getting to know each other, I asked why she chose to sit with me. It turns out, that a few moments before, she had exchanged "fighting words" with a surly girl who was with her unsavoury boyfriend. Jenna chose to sit with me in an effort to avoid trouble. It was purely a chance encounter that we met. At the end of our time, Jenna asked if we will see each other again. I didn't want to exchange phone numbers or email so I told Jenna we'll meet again by way of chance encounter.[/quote]