Forum Overview :: Peter Molyneux's The Movies :: Resident Evil Toronto Apocalypse

[quote name="Fussbett"]There's a new Uwe Boll in town, and his name is whoever directed Resident Evil Apocalypse! Toronto plays the part of Raccoon City. The <a href="http://www.schizophrenia.on.ca/bridge.html" target="suicide">Bloor Street Viaduct</a> being Raven's Gate Bridge, city hall playing city hall, and my favourite, the <a href="http://cinematreasures.org/theater/3011/" target="movies">Westwood Theatre</a> playing the Westwood Theatre, where I saw many movies as a child, all of which better than Resident Evil Apocalypse. Well, maybe <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085935/" target="syn">Metal Storm: The Destruction of Jared Syn</a> was worse, but at least it was in 3D. Bashing RE:A is like shooting fish in barrel. A barrel made of dynamite, with the fish already dead and stuffed into the barrel of your gun. We can all pick our breaking points because it's one self-parodying cliché after another. Every time I type one out, I ask myself "is that REALLY the worst one?" and then delete it in favour of another. I think I've settled on that fact that the heroes take a break from the zombie outbreak by resting in cemetary. I leave what happens next up your imagination. I hope your imagination involves lots of kicking. Jill Valentine. Remember when she almost became a "Jill sandwich" in Resident Evil: The Video Game? Well now she's a tough as leather bitch who wears big leather boots and maybe even eats leather. She'll shoot the fuck out of anything and then smoke the shit out of a cigarette and then scowl the crap out of your ugly face, so you'd better watch yourself. But then when her partner gets bitten, she can't bring herself to shoot him. Whoops, I just pointed out another cliché. In summary, Paul Anderson wrote this movie and is trying his best to ruin movies forever.[/quote]