Forum Overview :: Tales of the Sword Coast :: In all seriousness, are you completely socially retarded?

[quote name="Mischief Maker"]Your skype attempt to make up with the Gnome quickly degenerates into you demanding apologies from her. You have a "gift from god" chat session with the Gypsy drop into your lap and you can't keep your yap shut about the whoring. Finally you try to set up a date with the whore I call "Stabby" (I call her that because she wants to stab you in the genitals) and by your third line you're calling her an ugly skank. Has coming of age rich and white in SE Asia made you literally incapable of carrying on a conversation without being a complete asshole? You're beginning to remind me of the stereotypical unpopular kid in high school who starts <A HREF="http://www.derfcity.com/comix/jd/jd1.html" TARGET="new">acting outrageously silly</A> for attention. Only you're pushing 30 and you're <I>still</I> doing it, for chrissakes! Yeah, the whoring exploits get you attention at Caltrops, but it ain't good attention. I mean re-read your own post. You can't even concentrate on passing the time with a video game, your entire life is revolving around the whores. Is this why you can't keep a friend for longer than 2 weeks? Is your whole social life like the movie "Grosse Pointe Blank?" Only instead of telling everyone you're a hitman and they laugh it off as a joke, you're telling them you're a reprehensible deviant? They first meet you and you're all, "I eat pubic hair, hit the whorehouses 3 times a week, and my life's dream is to be a successful Gigolo!" At first everyone laughs and says, "That QB, he's such a crazy jokester!" Then after 2 weeks you're still harping on the whores, and they realize to their horror you've been dead serious all this time. Then they start coming up with bullshit reasons to cut off all social contact with you. "Oh, dude, I'm so sorry, but I can't be friends with you anymore. You see... uh... I'm married and you're not. And, like, I can't be friends with single guys! It's a Muslim thing, you understand." Imagine his response if you hadn't blown it with the gnome, "Oh! Oh, you... YOU got married? Wow. Well, congratulations and all. Who on Earth, I mean who married you? A Taiwanese heiress, you say? Oh, hey, living the dream. Buuuuuuut we still can't be friends because... because... because... because she's from Taiwan! And Bahrain doesn't recognize Taiwan so, like, if I was your friend it'd cause an international incident. You understand." Also, assholes clinging to you as a conscience buffer for cheating on their wives don't count.[/quote]