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by Ice Cream Jonsey 09/03/2008, 2:27pm PDT |
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Fuck Bill then, trying to save fat guys during the zombie uprising is like having a girl on your flag football team: we had one group of illegals that were in our flag football league. (I know "flag" is gay, but we're all old.) They had a girl on their team, no doubt a relative of someone, and she went maybe 5'1" 105lbs. Invariably, someone would accidentally run her over and all of a sudden their HOT LATIN BLOOD would get all fired up and we'd be informed that shit just got real, or whatever that translates to in chirps and clicks. My point is that it is just isn't worth it in either situation, although you can at least point to one fat guy bringing something to the table in a zombie apocalypse (Nick Frost in Shaun of the Dead) but you can't really when it comes to girls in sports, so I guess this is where the metaphor breaks down.
That reminds me of something else I loved about Dead Rising, which I assume is OK to post, because what the fuck else are we all talking about this week. The skateboard was incredible. I thought that I'd be smacking people with it, but when I found out that you just skate through the mall with it, well, I don't even have the words to say how awesome that is. Ditto the hockey stick (shooting pucks!) and the mascot head, which actually caused me to laugh out loud while playing a video game, which happens about once every 10 years. The designers managed to attach a 'hidden' attribute to every single weapon in the game, which is not just how awesome it would be to use that in combat, but HOW it can be used in combat.
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey! |
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Can I swap the cell phone for one that instantly sends calls to voicemail? NT by Ice Cream Jonsey 09/02/2008, 1:19pm PDT 
Would it have been too much to use me instead of tiny HD text? NT by VOICE(!) 09/02/2008, 2:34pm PDT
Exactly. I would like to complain about the following: by Ice Cream Jonsey 09/02/2008, 3:05pm PDT
Sounds like you quit before the jeep by FABIO 09/02/2008, 8:35pm PDT
This is important by Lizard_King 09/02/2008, 8:52pm PDT
Why does the game work that way anyway? by Creexuls, a monster >:3 09/02/2008, 8:57pm PDT
Okay. Yeah, I was playing it wrong. by Ice Cream Jonsey 09/03/2008, 12:42am PDT
Re: Okay. Yeah, I was playing it wrong. by Lizard_King 09/03/2008, 5:50am PDT
ICJ: stop reading ways to play the game and just play the game. by Fussbett 09/03/2008, 9:47am PDT
Re: ICJ: stop reading ways to play the game and just play the game. by Ice Cream Jonsey 09/03/2008, 1:10pm PDT
Who needs a top ten when you've got a top ONE HUNDRED? by Jerry Whorebach 09/03/2008, 1:19pm PDT
If you have trouble finding him again, the name of the store is IN THE CLOSET. NT by Oh, those scamperous nips! 09/03/2008, 1:21pm PDT
yeah you have to clean out a full column of boxes for him. (He's fat) NT by Fussbett 09/03/2008, 2:09pm PDT
My top 100 list is first drafty nonsense. I disavow most of it. So: Bill, then by Ice Cream Jonsey 09/03/2008, 2:27pm PDT
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