Forum Overview :: Motherfucking News
 
Too bad the Chollima Group website is dead now (Veronica to blame?) by Fussbett 10/10/2006, 9:55pm PDT
Sanitario666: Have you seen the official North Korean website?
conflictNo: NO, but I'd like to
conflictNo: Unless it's just going to make me feel bad about myself
Sanitario666: Well this will make you day. Download the SONG OF NATIONAL DEFENCE right now.
Sanitario666: http://www.korea-dpr.com/defend.htm
Sanitario666: I love that URL. DEFEND.htm You get to that page by clicking on FRIENDSHIP/LINKS from the main menu. Imagine my shock.
conflictNo: "DEFEND THE DPR OF KOREA !!" <--note the second exclamation point.
Sanitario666: Listening to the KFA HYMN (song of national defence) will be one of the high points of your life.
conflictNo: I wonder if their copy of Photoshop is legit?
Sanitario666: The scuttlebutt is that the entire site was made by some US kid who wrote to the DPRK requesting information for his North Korean website.
Sanitario666: SUPPOSEDLY they hired him up to make the whole official site.
conflictNo: That'll look nice on a resume
Sanitario666: Until the recruiter sees the site. :(
conflictNo: NA KA JA INMIN KUNDE!
conflictNo: I'm going to get that tattooed on my abdomen
Sanitario666: 22 seconds into the KFA Hymn is where things really start cooking. Then, 4 seconds later, BIG SMILE.
conflictNo: I'm halfway there. I can't believe I'm downloading something from NORTH KOREA! It's like a dream...
Sanitario666: Notice the webmaster's desire to never use text, always giant JPGs. I can't even fathom what the site is like on dial-up.
conflictNo: I think it helps me feel what the people of North Korea feel
conflictNo: somehow they decided to make the lyrics into a .pdf file
Sanitario666: Yeah, WHY NOT?
conflictNo: also: NICE SEAL, BOYS



conflictNo: They are proud of their one dam, and possibly wheat
Sanitario666: "Only a few people in the world know that Korea is divided by a big concrete wall in the Parallel 38..."
Sanitario666: I was one of those people, conflictNo!
Sanitario666: This feeling I feel must be what it's like to win something.
conflictNo: CAN'T FOCUS...MP3 PLAYING
conflictNo: That kicked ASS
Sanitario666: I was not exaggerating.
conflictNo: I feel soooo good.
conflictNo: Anyway, you should email them about knowing of the big concrete wall. You could get a shining medal for your heart.
Sanitario666: "Send you comments, regards and poems to korea@korea-dpr.com"
conflictNo: POEMS!
Sanitario666: They are a beautiful people.
conflictNo: That could be CV's new theme [CV is Cabaret Voltron! -- Fussbett 2006]
conflictNo: We could become the official gaming website of the People's DPRKP of North Korea
conflictNo: Imagine getting linked to by North Korea...
Sanitario666: The sad thing is that no one inside North Korea has seen that website probably.
Sanitario666: Even the top technology dude.
conflictNo: Or any website
Sanitario666: Ohhhhh yeah, it's a BRAZILLIAN kid who made the site!
conflictNo: I see that it's translated into Esperanto..that's always good
Sanitario666: Carlos Henrique B. Pereira
General Secretary of the Institute of Friendship Brazil-Korea


Sanitario666: http://www.chollima-group.com/
conflictNo: MORE!
Sanitario666: Better shot of the seal, too. "Hydro Electricity -- YOU BETTER BELIEVE WE'VE GOT IT!"
conflictNo: Haha
conflictNo: It would appear that they've harnessed the power of the sun, as well.
Sanitario666: There are NO PRODUCTS, so put your credit card away.
conflictNo: Not even a mug?
Sanitario666: Fuck, could you imagine?!
Sanitario666: A mug with that seal on it?
conflictNo: I would start drinking coffee just for that mug.
Sanitario666: I hear Cafe Press calling...
conflictNo: DO YOU HAVE ESP?!
conflictNo: Any ass can use them to sell a mug, right? WHY NOT A COUNTRY?

Why visit the DPRK with Chollima Group?
1. We can get you closer than anyone else to the real DPRK

Previous travellers to the DPRK claim that they feel they were seeing only a small portion of the country, namely what the DPRK government wanted tourists to see. This is certainly so; if visiting the country as a tourist through KITC, the national tourism authority, and its associated foreign tour companies you are permitted to see only what is on the tourist paths and little else.

Chollima Group can take you further than that. Our principal contacts dealing with visitors to the country is not KITC but the National Committee for Cultural Relations with Foreign Countries. This is a superior organisation with the capacity to report directly to Kim Jong Il himself and possessing greater powers than KITC. Through this organisation, we can create itineraries taking in not just the normal tourist routes but other places of interest beyond these, as well as placing our guests in circumstances and situations that the average tourist wouldnt find themselves in. A much greater degree of interaction with Korean citizens is possible, whether it is eating in local (rather than tourist-designated) restaurants, visiting and even participating in co-operative farm work, or just strolling around Pyongyang and taking in the scenes; just a few examples.


Sanitario666: "even participating in co-operative farm work"
Sanitario666: Ah, North Korea! The siren song of farm work.
conflictNo: Tell me more!
conflictNo: I haven't clicked on it yet, but the link to "-Taekwondo packages" can only be a good thing.
Sanitario666: I'm totally reading that now!
Lasting from 2 weeks to several years, and covering skills from beginner to expert, we can put together a personalised training package to suit your needs. Practising Taekwondo groups from around the world are welcome and a group training and instruction course can easily be arranged to suit your requirements.

conflictNo: Several years! That's some package
Sanitario666: Why are you not clicking? Saving it for later? Or you can't close down Winamp?
conflictNo: I chose Hints and Tips instead
conflictNo: MASS GYMNASTICS!
conflictNo: "These include radios, modems, transmitters, GPS systems, pornography and telescopes."
conflictNo: Those are items that can't be brought into the country, presumably in that order
conflictNo: NO TELESCOPES
Sanitario666: "...will not be taken lightly."
Sanitario666: That's pretty scary.
conflictNo: Yeah, you can count on that one.
conflictNo: Without radios, how do the people totally jam out to the DPRK hot hits?
Sanitario666: There is a MASS SINGING event possibly often?
conflictNo: Such wonders...
conflictNo: "There are also plenty of soft drinks available." Well, allright!
conflictNo: The forums: "So what would you folks like to talk to a Texan About?--db"
conflictNo: SCOOPED! By a day...
Sanitario666: THERE's A FORUM@!?!
conflictNo: OH HELL YEAH. Brand new.
Sanitario666: Ok Shhhhh! I need to get into forum mode.

I was wondering how I might go about getting a portrait or some other item of the Great and Dear Leaders since I want my otherwise empty living quaters to adorned with them as a reminder of what we must strive for in our everyday life here in England.

Long Live DPRK!

Sanitario666: Just stop eating and you can then get the full DPRK experience

Everybody knows the North Koreans enjoy some of the best living conditions in the world. Much of the information on Western media sources is the fabricated propaganda of shameless imperialists and their treacherous allies.

To suggest they are starving is a scandalous lie, the likes of which often propagated by green-eyed Western governments in a attempt to discredit the success of D.P.R.K economic policy.


conflictNo: Yeah, how can such insolence be tolerated?
Sanitario666: Yeah FUCK THAT GUY.
Sanitario666: That might be my first comment.
conflictNo: Totally banned!
conflictNo: A whole North Korean family was probably executed for that guy's post.
Sanitario666: green-eyed Western governments. Man that's great.
conflictNo: We're pretty.
Sanitario666: This forum is a total bane on the head DPRK technology guy. He's probably screaming at his personal veronica right now.
conflictNo: YEAH!
conflictNo: "We hope to offer a variety of posters from this summer onwards -Admin"
Sanitario666: I don't know what to type! It's all too much.
Sanitario666: I can't decide on a persona.
Sanitario666: I think I'm going to pass out.
conflictNo: I know, we're like diplomats.
conflictNo: I'll follow your lead, to give the impression of a two-pronged attack.
Sanitario666: Wait, that's your persona recommendation? DPRK diplomats?
Sanitario666: I think I'm too giddy to pull that off right now.
conflictNo: Hmm...
Sanitario666: I'll puncj myself in the stomach a bit.
Sanitario666: No no, I can do it.
Sanitario666: Here we go...
Sanitario666: (researching Korean name)
conflictNo: I've got to use the bathroom!
conflictNo: <-- Park Yong Jun
Sanitario666: <-- Hwang Soon Hee
Sanitario666: Park, that's nice.
conflictNo: One of the three most common Korean family names!
Sanitario666: Right now I'm researching my official position.
Sanitario666: "North Korean Foreign Ministry"
Sanitario666: Will I get killed?
Sanitario666: I'm too scared to sign it with North Korean Foreign Ministry!
conflictNo: Someone will!
Sanitario666: Ok I posted. Playing it safe to start off.
conflictNo: Good!
conflictNo: Curious, yet threatening
conflictNo: I think I'll start a new thread...
Sanitario666: If he truly thinks NK is as bad as the rumours, he will be nervous.
conflictNo: or should I say, "Create New Conversation"
Sanitario666: This forum is totally fresh in every facet!
Sanitario666: No SB!
Sanitario666: I'm loving it.
Sanitario666: I like how the Texan guy think people are there to find out about Texas. He's open for questions! Shoot!
conflictNo: Hehe, ask him about his cowboy hat!
Sanitario666: I did ask him about his cowboy hat WITH A TWIST.
Sanitario666: Where is your conversation already?!?!
conflictNo: Done.
conflictNo: I went for the nonsensical poor English angle
Sanitario666: I like that even with FORCED preview, we still squeeze in the typos.
Sanitario666: That's dedication.
conflictNo: Clearly the fault of the green-eyes.
Sanitario666: We've gotta find the name of that dam.
conflictNo: Mt. Kumgang Dam...?
conflictNo: If that's the one, it's CRACKED
Sanitario666: DISHONOUR.
conflictNo: THE RED STAR IS ANGERED.
conflictNo: Wow, my post may really touch some nerves in light of this new information.
conflictNo: Mt. Geumgang?
Sanitario666: Yeah, that dam probably just exploded and killed thousands.
conflictNo: With much glory.
Sanitario666: " Kumgangsan Dam Built on 'Death Marches' "

Confronted with its harshest economic woes, Pyongyang formally kicked off the "hardship march" in 1995. Workers encountered tremendous ordeals as the mammoth project was resumed at such a juncture in time. The (North) Korean Central News Agency, evaluating Kim Jong Il's five-year rule in 1999, cited the Kumgangsan Dam project as one of the five "amazing events" that took place in the period.

conflictNo: "Pyongyang said on May 6 that claims about the cracks were a "sheer lie" and that the dam was intact."

It is difficult to know the exact reason why the North constructed the Kumgangsan Dam, but troops and officials mobilized in the project have testified that it was "to solve power shortages in the Kangwon provincial area," and "to utilize the dam for military purposes in a war."

Sanitario666: So wacky.
conflictNo: What the hell is its real name?
conflictNo: Anyway, I'm learning so much.
Sanitario666: Is it possible that the seal doesn't represent one dam, but the mere glorious CONCEPT of dam building?
conflictNo: I suppose it might have to.

Still another North Korean defector, who was lieutenant colonel at the Pyongyang Garrison Command at the time, quoted Kim Il Sung as claiming "the dam, once completed, could be more destructive than a nuclear bomb," adding, "Had the dam had no justifiable military objectives, Kim Jong Il would not been so attached to that project when a large number of people were starving to death."

The Mount Kumgang Dam construction was literally a "project of death." "An entire 40-plus company were buried in water while drilling an underground waterway," claimed Kim Chang-shik, who took part in the project as a rock driller for a few years beginning in 1995. "We had to work with primitive equipment, putting up with hunger." To help fill manpower shortages, even female members of mobile propaganda teams in Pyongyang were mobilized for the project.


conflictNo: So the dam is a weapon!
Sanitario666: I could go on all day!!!
conflictNo: I don't see an end.
Sanitario666: HOLY CRAP

Pyongyang disclosed in 1986 that 50,000 troops would be deployed in the project. To boost the morale of troopers, the authorities conferred large numbers of Kim Il Sung decorations, Kim Jong Il memorial medals, labor hero and distinguished driver titles.

Sanitario666: Distinguished driver titles! I thought getting a decoration would be the be-all, end-all, but no...
conflictNo: Morale boosters probably mean some of the guns might only have blanks.
conflictNo: I imagine everyone in NK walking around with some kind of medal.
Sanitario666: That could be a question for the forum.
Sanitario666: Post a picture of your medals or decorations!!!
conflictNo: Top 10 medals.
Sanitario666: http://www.collectrussia.com/showcat.htm?cat=NKOREAN
Sanitario666: " Medal for the Construction of the Kun Gang Hydroelectric Dam, 1990s. Gilded aluminum. "
conflictNo: FOR SALE?!
Sanitario666: $150
conflictNo: That's like the most fantastic Googling ever.
conflictNo: $150 is a steal!
Sanitario666: It's too bad you won't have it in time to see your girlfriend.
conflictNo: SNAP!
conflictNo: Yeah, that's going to be something.
conflictNo: "Scarce due to small size of project."
Sanitario666: Compared to a war...
Sanitario666: " Agricultural Merit Medal. Dark silvered finish, shows a tractor in the field. Excellent condition. "
Sanitario666: " Youth Railway Construction Award. Silver-plated brass. Raised date 1951 Awarded to youngsters drafted to build railways during the Korean War. Excellent condition. Serial numbered. "
conflictNo: I had my eye on that one.
Sanitario666: " Order of Coal Mining Industry Service Honor, 2nd cl, circa 1970s-80s "
Sanitario666: Those are my three favourites.
conflictNo: I know that I want 8 year-olds building my railways.
Sanitario666: It's not a bad idea. They probably went nuts trying to earn those medals.
conflictNo: "Red Flag Company Badge, 2nd award. Silver center medallion showing attacking North Korean troops with tanks, rockets, speedboats and airplanes. On the background is Mt. Paekdu, Korean national symbol. Excellent."
Sanitario666: Imagine being the one kid in your tent city that DIDN'T have a medal? Pffft.
conflictNo: You would probably be eaten.
Sanitario666: Rockets and speedboats?! I guess that's a medal for an upcoming war.
conflictNo: The Cobra Triangle Liberation War
Sanitario666: Whoa, wait a second. Mt. Paekdu is Korea's national symbol?
conflictNo: I'm as surprised as you are.
conflictNo: They're so complicated.
Sanitario666: There's a symbol and a medal for everything.
conflictNo: And which is it: Fatherland or Motherland?
conflictNo: Can a nation be both?
Sanitario666: You've seen them mention Motherland? I've only seen Fatherland.
conflictNo: I think Motherland was in the lyrics...
conflictNo: "Let us defend the people's Motherland"
conflictNo: INMINE JOGUK UL JI KI ZA
Sanitario666: Oh wow, you opened that PDF? Commitment.
conflictNo: Seriously, is that a real language?
Sanitario666: They would never allow their language to be simplified.
conflictNo: JOGUK = Motherland
Sanitario666: It's a beautiful language.
conflictNo: That .pdf is like the Rosetta Stone
Sanitario666: One can only imagine the poems going into the korea@korea-dpr.com mailbox.
Sanitario666: GI KOGUT IL TO!
MINEE EI TO IL SAK!
ISIK ZI ZA JOGUK!
Sanitario666: Oh wait, that's Klingon.
conflictNo: OMG!
conflictNo: That would explain a lot.
Sanitario666: The Red Star = Klingon home world?
conflictNo: I don't know. I would think Star Trek would lead to telescopes pretty quickly.
conflictNo: I'll have to listen to the .mp3 a few more times.
Sanitario666: One thing is clear: Kim Jong Il loves showtunes.
Sanitario666: korea-dpr.com hints at a secret forum somewhere.
Sanitario666: holy fuck, I found it.
Sanitario666: http://www.korea-dpr.com/cgi-bin/simpleforum.cgi
conflictNo: A place where Friends can just let go and be themselves.
conflictNo: You'll get the People's Award for Website Searching of the 3rd Order, for sure.
conflictNo: NK-con!

President Kim Il Sung is the eternal sun of the nation and a lodestar of national reunification as he dedicated his whole life to the country and the nation and performed immortal feats for the cause of national reunification, says Rodong Sinmun today in a signed article.

Sanitario666: LODESTAR
conflictNo: You're damn right.
conflictNo: Apparently you can't bring powder into the country, either.
Sanitario666: Ultimately it's very difficult to be a friend of the DPRK.
Sanitario666: They make you jump through a lot of hoops, and deny you your powder.
conflictNo: I bet it would be a really funny joke if you brought a copy of the movie "Powder"
Sanitario666: Would I be killed instantly or would I be tortured and then killed?
Sanitario666: How could a BRIDGE be photo sensitive? Are the enemies of NK really wondering how they built that bridge?
conflictNo: Probably wondering how the bridge has managed to not collapse.

11TH DAY -28TH JULY- MONDAY
Volunteer work in the Taek Am farm
Lunch with the peasants
Return to Pyongyang. On our way back visit an ostrichs farm.

Sanitario666: That's the best day of the trip.
conflictNo: Ostrich!
Sanitario666: Why are ostriches not on the official seal?
Sanitario666: Jesus christ, what a lost opportunity.
conflictNo: There is probably a medal for them.
conflictNo: also, Bjornar Simonsen, International Counselor: total fag?
conflictNo: Is this guy really in Norway and referring to Kim Il Sung as the "Great Leader Kim Il Sung"?
Sanitario666: As a fellow infiltrator, I agree, it's a lame cover-up.
Sanitario666: Constantly dropping "fatherland" too.
conflictNo: How deep do I have to dig to find the Kim Il Sung/Kim Jong Il slash fiction?
conflictNo: My guess: not far.
Sanitario666: You can't post to the forum without a password that you get from applying.
Sanitario666: With that setback, I'm off. HAIL THE LODESTAR!
conflictNo: May the Great Leader guide you!
Session Close (conflictNo): Sun May 04 04:58:47 2003
PREVIOUS NEXT REPLY QUOTE
 
AIM log request: North Korean Adventure! by conflictNo 10/09/2006, 7:25pm PDT NEW
    Re: AIM log request: North Korean Adventure! by motherfuckerfoodeater 10/09/2006, 8:26pm PDT NEW
    I ran some numbers by Ray of Light 10/09/2006, 8:32pm PDT NEW
        I smell asshurt! NT by Asshurt Sniffing Machine 10/09/2006, 8:49pm PDT NEW
            "I feel sorry for him / it's sad / he has no life" --The Refrain of the Mocked NT by reprinted courtesy of LIVEJOURNAL 10/09/2006, 10:40pm PDT NEW
                "Get walking, chinks, and be thankful we don't need boots." MADE MY DAY! NT by Quentin Beck 10/10/2006, 6:18pm PDT NEW
    Too bad the Chollima Group website is dead now (Veronica to blame?) by Fussbett 10/10/2006, 9:55pm PDT NEW
        I hope everyone enjoyed that. NT by conflictNo 10/11/2006, 2:07pm PDT NEW
            I'm sure that this guy didn't. by conflictNo 10/15/2006, 1:52am PDT NEW
 
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