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by Long, Shuddering Spurt Over Druids 05/06/2005, 9:19pm PDT |
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Opinion is fine, but today’s gamer needs more than just ignorance and superstition to base his game purchases on. He needs science. He might be asking himself, “When will someone conduct a scientific investigation to determine whether Guild Wars is good or not?” Well, that time is now and that someone is me, as long as we stretch the word investigation to include looking at a webpage.
We all know that how good any game is in the Penny Arcade newspost is inversely proportional to how good it is when you’re actually playing it. So we can determine how good it is right there. Let’s begin!
Tycho wrote:
I was shocked to see Gamespot's 9.2 review of the game, though it seems like they're just handing that shit out these days. The reality, however, is that if the smoking hot Greg Kasavin played it with some guys from the office, earning levels and abilities, eventually culminating in some kind of epic player versus player matchup, the score just isn't that surprising. Once you get off the bunny hill and mount the shuddering chairlift to Death Mountain, you start to understand what they're getting at.
A promising start in denigrating the Gamespot rating, but things start to turn sour as soon as he's out of his metaphor.
Tycho wrote:
Combat is extremely fast-paced in Guild Wars. A ten second buff lasts an eternity. Things go to hell quickly. They can be redeemed just as fast. So if you've heard the words MMO and Guild Wars together, it creates a kind of mental template which you imagine will define certain elements of the experience, and then a warrior caves in your skull with a maul. The immediacy of it is intense and strangely addictive.
Not looking good for Guild Wars. "Intense" is strike two, with "strangely addictive" strike three. Time to ball it up and toss it … but what’s this next sentence?
Tycho wrote:
I'm curious to see how long I will maintain this level of enthusiasm. My guess is shortly after the banners come down.
Rarely can a game pull it's ass out of the fire like that! He's just up on it because they're advertising on his site. And vaguely threatening them to keep the cash coming. But that’s another investigation!
Tycho wrote:
I'm trying to maintain this cynical... thing, I guess, about Guild Wars and it's just not working. I'm completely charmed by it. (CW)TB
And back in the toilet. It was quite a ride you and me had, Guild Wars, but the facts cannot be denied. Unless they sent him another check? I guess only Tycho's bank account knows for sure if you should buy Guild Wars. And Tycho himself, who will kind of reverse know it. |
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So... Guild Wars. by Long, Shuddering Spurt Over Druids 04/28/2005, 8:12pm PDT 
Unless there's a... caltrops guild? NT by pinkie goes next to mouth 04/28/2005, 8:27pm PDT
Fuck. by Bill Dungsroman 04/28/2005, 9:05pm PDT
Whatever did happen to that post? NT by FABIO 04/28/2005, 10:20pm PDT
Everyone fucked veronica while SB flexed in the corner. NT by Bill Dungsroman 04/28/2005, 11:36pm PDT
thwe beiipolarity Axe Effect???/ NT by Entropy Stew 04/29/2005, 3:35am PDT
Welcome back NT by Mountain Dew Code Red 04/29/2005, 7:30am PDT
I thought that one wasn't me for a minute :( NT by Entropy Stew 04/29/2005, 10:52am PDT
Re: Fuck. by FABIO 05/07/2005, 3:39am PDT
MMO Annoyances by jeep 04/29/2005, 10:55pm PDT
New (but equal) annoyance: don't tell anyone they can buy it online, ever by Long, Shuddering Spurt Over Druids 04/30/2005, 5:22am PDT
Re: New (but equal) annoyance: don't tell anyone they can buy it online, ever by jeep 05/04/2005, 4:57pm PDT
And the facts are in by Long, Shuddering Spurt Over Druids 05/06/2005, 9:19pm PDT
My favorite thing to do so far by Daverd 05/14/2005, 2:33pm PDT
Re: My favorite thing to do so far by Universal Plan B 05/14/2005, 8:52pm PDT
It sounds like SOMEONE is no stranger to getting served... NT by Fussbett 05/15/2005, 2:26pm PDT
It's ON! NT by FABIO 05/15/2005, 5:39pm PDT
So how abouts a Caltrops Guild? I bought the game because of this thread alone! NT by Galvon 06/19/2005, 3:54pm PDT
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