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| A Trip To The Mall by Senor Barborito 06/21/2003, 2:07am PDT | ||||
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| They're closing in - that attractive asian woman, that doddering old woman with a cane, that odd-looking man at the bus stop - they're all packing guns I can see them. Christ this is a fucking setup. A goddamn undercover cop operation - they're all going to jump me and put a gun to my head and pin me down. Oh God, surrounded. Everywhere, they're coming in on every vector and I can't watch them all at once - no, don't stare, and for God's sake stop thrashing your head back and forth trying to watch them all at once like some kind of fucking retard. Just glance over the shoulder every 10 paces . . . 1 . . . 2 . . . 3 . . .
Here they come . . . OK, they walked past me, good sign - shit, wait, this is where they whirl around and fire dead center, isn't it? Shit. Shit Shit SHIT it's the newspaper vending machines again - fuck, I know those things are loaded with nailbombs. Cross the 6-lane? Blast, too full - I KNEW IT. ANOTHER FUCKING SETUP. THEY'RE IN LEAGUE THE GODDAMN BASTARDS THIS ISN'T MY FAULT I'M GOING TO DIE BECAUSE THEY'RE ALL COOPERATING AGAINST ME AND I COULD TAKE ANY OF THEM ONE ON ONE BUT THESE THOUSAND-PERSON CONSPIRACIES TO KILL ME ARE TOO MUCH . . . no, no, don't cry you fucking idiot, they've all been out after you since the goddamned day you were born - you ought to be able to emotionally cope by now, so just keep walking . . . Intersection, old lady - wait, fat and bulky. Confirmed: suicide bomber, keep clear. I'm still going to be deaf at this distance if she goes off now. Start counting SUVs to pass the time if you're bored, try and picture each driver dying in a seperate hideous way 1 - 2 - 3 - . . . fuck I hate Bellevue. Another . . . 8 in that parking lot over there. Fucking American shit-eaters . . . I'll fly back just to put your type up against the wall when the Revolution comes, I swear it . . . Oh joy, a McDonald's - Let us rape you in exchange for providing you with a means of a tasty, slow McSuicide with the cholesterol content of our lard-slathered shit! One anal violation right in the wallet-hole, coming right up! You'd all be far more interesting bursting into flame and screaming blood-curdling half-sobs/half-shrieks. Yeah, now that's one for the imagination . . . mmmmmm . . . Oh for fuck's sake are you staring at the McDonald's again? Don't make me make you smack your own head in public again - remember last time you did that? That's what I thought, pussy - keep walking . . . . . . 54 SUVs. . . 55 . . . 56 . . . those crash tests would be a lot more useful to the average American consumer these days if they used the Blimpsons from that last one - and a lot more amusing if the walls had 10 foot tungsten spikes protruding from them - no, do not look at the girl, idiot, she's just another goddamned attention-starved whore packed chock full of STDs and typical female bullshit complexes, keep walking or I won't let you jerk it tonight . . . Fuck, the unfinished building. Please don't come crashing down on me please don't come crashing down on me Oh God they've got it rigged this time I know it this is it, this is it, don't grit your teeth in public, this is it, is that a tear, bitch? FUCK FUCK FUCK I CAN FEEL IT IN MY BACK SOMEONE'S STARING AT ME. Oh God, I know it. There's a red dot on my back fuck looking human jink left, throw him off, now turn the next corner you're in the sights you're in the sights MOVE. I'm going to throw up this is it this is it just grit your teeth and wait for it and FUCK YOU BIG BROTHER . . . nothing? GODDAMNIT, they're cat and mousing me. . . . 98 . . . 99 . . .100 . . . think that's about 240 occupants who need to die screaming in their sleep for being fat pathetic wasteful consumer sheep blowing their lives on crap they don't need that burns gas like an oil fire in Kuwait . . . Oh God no, almost there. Please no . . . 117 . . . 118 . . . and we're there. 298 assholes fuck all of you SUV owners when the virus wipes you out and leaves me I'm spending a week with a baseball bat and reducing your windshields and rotting skulls to a slurry of glass slivers and red paste. Door. Deep breath. You can do thi - OK, one more deep breath then . . . NO. TOO MANY. NOOOOOOOOO. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeePAINPAINPAINPAINAUGHHHHhhhh. *cut to black* --SB |
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A Trip To The Mall by 06/21/2003, 2:07am PDT  GUMDROPS AND RAINBOWS by 06/21/2003, 4:04am PDT Re: GUMDROPS AND RAINBOWS by 06/21/2003, 10:26am PDT Re: A Trip To The Mall by 06/21/2003, 7:00am PDT |
