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| Two circles, barely touching, one labelled BUNS and the other SPLITS. by Van Dammagram 08/18/2017, 8:23pm PDT | ||||
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HOW IT'S DONE 1. Stand side-on to the person you're about to impress, arms hanging loose at your sides. 2. With unbelievable speed and precision, elevate your bicep until it's parallel to the ground, while simultaneously contracting your elbow and rotating your palm inward. 3. DO NOT flex self-consciously, or make a fist, or any of the gay body builder shit you've been practicing up until now. This is all new gay body builder shit. 4. I'm not kidding about the speed. When done correctly, your palm will crack like a whip, producing an audible "whoosh." 5. Glare seductively over your engorged muscles. Without a doubt, the hardest and most critical part of this entire manoeuvre is keeping a straight face. Think of it as acting. 6. The unspoken subtext of the Van Damme is you could have slapped a bitch upside the head, had you chosen to. The spoken subtext is "do me." |
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Two circles, barely touching, one labelled BUNS and the other SPLITS. by 08/18/2017, 8:23pm PDT  |
