Forum Overview :: Rants
 
Shit that never happened thread by Brandon Flick 10/26/2014, 9:38am PDT
This beauty was on Metafilter.



I once busted out a rant like this at a hairdresser's.

I was platinum blond as a child, but by now it's darkened to a much darker "dishwater blond" that sometimes, in certain lights, looks a bit dull. I got my first gray hair sometime in my early 30's, and they've been coming in more and more quickly since then. And so once, when I was getting a haircut, the stylist asked me if I'd ever considered getting my hair colored as well, ever?

"...No," I said. "I'm actually good with how it is."

"Oh, not to change it," she said, "just brighten it up a little, or maybe" (here her voice dropped to a whisper) "cover up any gray hairs."

"Actually," I said, "I like my gray hairs. Because you know what, I know each and every thing that probably gave me each of these gray hairs - all the late nights doing theater, and the shows I did, and how I busted my ass to do them. And - actually, here, look at this," I said, pulling up my pant leg to show her a bruise-looking mark on my shin. "See that? Everyone asks me what happened to this - this is just a patch of burst capillaries. And you know, I could probably do something about that too, except - I'm pretty sure that I got this after walking this 60-mile walkathon a couple years back. I probably could have not done it and had awesome legs, but I'd much rather have had that awesome experience and a patch of burst capillaries." I was kind of on a roll now. "I just think that - look, I've done an awesome life, and okay, yeah, it's given me some gray hair and a couple scars and dings and nicks, but you know what, all that stuff has come along just beause I've been living a kick-ass life, and you know, I'm proud of that, so I want to keep my gray hair, dammit."

Both the other clients and one of the other stylists started cheering when I said that ("go girl!") and I think I saw one of the clients quietly confide to her stylist that you know what, she was actually going to cancel the coloring she'd been about to have, she'd just stick with the cut.

Besides, if you look at my gray hairs amid the rest of the hair, they're sparkly. I really like that.




Cheering, other customers canceling services - this deluded moron has it all.
NEXT REPLY QUOTE
 
Shit that never happened thread by Brandon Flick 10/26/2014, 9:38am PDT NEW
    They're not just grey hairs, they're sparkly Twilight grey hairs NT by Eurotrash 10/27/2014, 3:11pm PDT NEW
    She got burst capillaries after walking 8 hours a day for 3 days? NT by skip 10/28/2014, 4:35pm PDT NEW
 
powered by pointy