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| Zseni Interviews GoW God, I need clarification by Zseni: Warrior-Poet 03/27/2005, 9:01pm PST | ||||
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| [18:33] Zsenijeim: Can I interview you for my video game review website Caltrops, by the way?
[18:33] ToutSuite: sure why not [18:33] ToutSuite: I thought it was BDR's site [18:34] Zsenijeim: It's cool, I do freelance work. Okay first question: when you first set out to make a Clash Of The Titans game, was it difficult to get the licensing agreement? Or were they ready for you at the studio? [18:34] ToutSuite: "I don't believe in tape recorders." [18:35] ToutSuite: (David Bowie, to a young Cameron Crowe, who was trying to interview him for Rolling Stone) [18:35] Zsenijeim: You don't have to believe in it, pumpkin. Look, I'll put it in the fridge next to your jars of urine. [18:36] ToutSuite: okay [18:36] Zsenijeim: Okay second question: how did you make arrangements with Blizzard to bring the Barbarian character from Diablo 2 to a Sony game? [18:36] ToutSuite: you mean, like from Dairy Queen? [18:36] ToutSuite: we call it the DQ [18:37] Zsenijeim: DQ owns Blizzard? That's news to this gaming reporter. Okay third question: how did you move from calling the game Rune 2: God Of War to just God of War? Was it a He-Man/Cyborg thing? [18:39] ToutSuite: it was originally called Jeopardy: Lightning Round [18:39] Zsenijeim: So just a case of feature creep, then? [18:39] ToutSuite: sure [18:40] Zsenijeim: Good deal. Next question: in the part where you fuck the girl after the tutorial, why does he put another vase up after busting the first one? Are there vases under the bed? Does she put it up while Kratos is reading about red orbs? [18:43] ToutSuite: who cares what a woman does after you dump your jizz? [18:43] Zsenijeim: So is her orgasm faked? [18:44] ToutSuite: who knows? [18:44] ToutSuite: who CARES? [18:45] Zsenijeim: Not this gamer, that's for sure. I had to check to see if I had disabled vibration, the earth was so unshook. The follow-up question is - does it bother you to think that people are jerking off to your game? [18:46] ToutSuite: to, no. On, yes. [18:46] Zsenijeim: That's eminently sensible, though it also calls to mind Fussbett's 1000-word review of Zelda: The Wind Waker, which was a picture of the box with what was ostensibly jizz on it. It is a pretty jizztastic game. Lots of sinewy muscle. [18:47] Zsenijeim: Just to call attention here, my controller DOES vibrate when I summon Bahamut in FF9, but not when I'm fucking a girl in GoW. [18:48] Zsenijeim: Next question: where is all the pottery that you can break while fucking her - where is it all coming from? [18:48] Zsenijeim: Is she buying it with Kratos' scratch? [18:48] Zsenijeim: Is she at Pottery Yard all the time when not full of hero dick? [18:49] ToutSuite: I assume she cooks, as she is a woman [18:49] ToutSuite: so she needs pots to do that [18:50] Zsenijeim: Is the pot there specifically to break - i.e. she has positioned the endtable that close to the bed - in order to break the pot and distract Kratos from her badly faked orgasm? [18:51] ToutSuite: the interviewer seems unable to grasp how little Kratos cares about her, her sister, and their orgasm quotient [18:51] ToutSuite: they would know this, and not go to any trouble to deceive him, I imagine [18:51] ToutSuite: unless they were more stupid than they were lazy [18:51] Zsenijeim: So those two are sisters? [18:51] ToutSuite: sure [18:52] Zsenijeim: Do they do each other when Kratos isn't there? [18:52] ToutSuite: probably [18:52] ToutSuite: or clean [18:52] Zsenijeim: That's very traditional in what is a very traditional setting for epic heroism: ancient Athens. So does Kratos do her Greek style? [18:54] ToutSuite: them, and yes [18:54] Zsenijeim: Are they whores or just - sisters who happened to be around? [18:55] ToutSuite: probably whores [18:55] Zsenijeim: Clean girls or have they been around the block? [18:55] ToutSuite: clean [18:56] Zsenijeim: Do they have names? [18:56] ToutSuite: Salma and Kelly [18:57] Zsenijeim: I just wanted to mention that my controller DOES vibrate when I get lightly tapped in Soul Calibur II, but not when I'm fucking a nice clean whore in the ass in GoW. [18:57] Zsenijeim: Anyway thank you for your time, Tout, and thanks for the great game! [18:57] ToutSuite: I hope you're not going to post this. It seems really boring :( ADDENDUM: [18:57] Zsenijeim: I'll be sure to include that last line. [18:58] ToutSuite: so you are [18:58] Zsenijeim: Well yes, unless you absolutely positively don't want me to. [18:59] ToutSuite: nah, I just think most people will think it's dumb [18:59] ToutSuite: like me [18:59] Zsenijeim: Those people suck. It's a setpiece, building on context. |
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Zseni Interviews GoW God, I need clarification by 03/27/2005, 9:01pm PST  What, no color coding? :( by 03/27/2005, 9:10pm PST They're Indian. The vase is their husband. The breaking is his heart. by 03/28/2005, 8:33am PST Re: What, no color coding? :( by 03/28/2005, 10:19am PST Re: Zseni Interviews GoW God, I need clarification by 03/28/2005, 8:41am PST Re: Zseni Interviews GoW God, I need clarification by 03/28/2005, 10:53am PST Re: Zseni Interviews GoW God, I need clarification by 03/28/2005, 11:52am PST |
