Forum Overview :: Majesty

Erik Wolpaw's Majesty review by Ice Cream Jonsey 12/23/2011, 12:22am PST Mischief Maker said that Erik's Majesty review is no longer on Qt3. I haven't checked myself. It's on the Internet Archive here, though. Because I don't trust anyone to keep servers up but myself, I'm going to paste it below. As much as we like Bruce Geryk, we can't let him get away with the things he says. So we'll allow a guest rebuttor to comment on each of the Geryk Analyses. This time around, Old Man Murray's Erik Wolpaw stands up for Majesty, a game that Mr. Geryk doesn't like. The Geryk Rebuttal: Majesty By Erik Wolpaw I like Majesty a lot. Geryk doesn't. Since the police don't have a science lab to judge opinions like the one they have for solving crime, the question really isn't whether or not Majesty is a good game, but rather which one of us you should believe. To help you make your decision, I'm going to tell you a little bit about each of us. Like you, I'm a workingman. You may remember me as one of the faceless laborers that built the railroads that made Railroad Tycoon 2 great. There isn't much to tell about me, and what little there is wouldn't be very interesting anyway. Geryk, on the other hand, is an investment banker turned scientist. I don't 100% know what an investment bankers does. Though I seem to remember hearing about one that foreclosed on some family farms and then strutted down Main Street flaunting his silken finery and golden pinkie rings. As far as scientists go, well, you might recall scientists from that time they wanted to keep the Thing alive so that they could "study" it after it had already strangled, back-broke, or otherwise murdered more than several workingmen like you and me. And Geryk isn't a regular scientist, either. He's an MD/PhD. That's as much doctor as they'll let one man be. He also writes reviews for Gamespot during the time regular folk use for sleeping. Not only that, he reviews complicated stuff like flight simulators and those detailed turn-based historical war games - the ones the real prissy British and Nazi generals always have in the middle of their office when someone comes to say please don't make us do this or that because it'd be suicide, but the general's too busy getting his fancy army blouse tailored to even pay much attention. So, clearly, Geryk is a tightly wound overachiever and control freak. His biggest complaint against Majesty? Not surprisingly, it's that he can't directly steer his little men. The vast gulf between my opinion of Majesty and Geryk's can be traced to the fundamental difference in our personalities. Geryk is a doctor twice over, an avid student of history, and an investment banker. In his spare time, he's a professional game reviewer and, for all I know, Batman and a member of Van Halen. I, on the other hand, haven't accomplished anything and have more or less coasted through life without putting forth much effort. To put things in perspective: Geryk is a double doctor, while I never even finished Double Dragon because it was too hard. With that in mind, Majesty is my favorite strategy game. I get to make some straightforward decisions, create a bunch of little people, and then sit back while they go about their mighty magical business. High strung as he is, I'm sure the monocle pops out of Geryk's eye any time anyone - and that includes virtua anyones like an orc - does anything without his direct permission. I, on the other hand, couldn't be happier. You say you and the dwarf are gonna go raid a necropolis? I don't even know what a necropolis is, but it sounds like a good plan to me. I'll be the guy over here with a can of Blatz in each hand who's not even touching the mouse. In Bruce's own words: The difference between Majesty and an actual God game like Caesar III is that the latter is really a mathematical puzzle disguised as a game. Unfortunately, when you simplify a game to this extent, there have to be extra hooks to grab and maintain your interest, since the gameplay is so straightforward. In Majesty, it's watching all of your "characters" run around gaining levels, stopping for a drink, going to the bathroom, and what have you. You're supposed to cheer your little guys on, and delight in their triumphs. You're supposed to get attached to them, and feel a sense of loss when some lizard thing takes all of their "hit points." I'm not sure if he maybe wrote this paragraph by accident, because it's a great summary of just exactly why I love Majesty. As Geryk helpfully points out, Majesty is a God game in which you don't have to solve arbitrary math problems. And if that isn't reason enough to recommend it, it also has clear goals, multiple paths to achieve these goals, and a population system that makes every one of your citizens interesting and important. It's like a more structured Black and White with twenty or thirty simultaneous creatures, better scenarios, cool combat, and a less glacially paced and less ambiguous sense of escalating might. If - like Geryk - you don't get a thrill from watching stat bars rise, then it might be time to start considering a new hobby altogether. The only other lucid grievance he has is that pretending to be an elf is both "queer" and symptomatic of an "emotional deficiency". First of all, since Majesty never mentions the race of your unseen king character, the fact that Geryk was evidently play-acting an elf the entire time is his own creepy problem. Plus, after reading his glowing review of Europa Universalis, it appears that while he has an irrational grudge against elves, given half a chance, he'll happily spend sixty hours daydreaming he's Ferdinand Hapsburg. And as far as the queer part: Single men who keep cats and live in ornate Loetz glass houses shouldn't girly-throw stones, if you get my meaning. In case you don't, I'm suggesting that Geryk is a homosexual. Ultimately, we like what's familiar to us. For Bruce, that's solving math problems and bossing people around. For me, it's relaxing while other people do things so that I don't have to. And really, if you're honest with yourself, which one of us are you more like? Remember: Geryk is gay, a doctor, an investment banker, and then a doctor again.

Erik Wolpaw's Majesty review by Ice Cream Jonsey 12/23/2011, 12:22am PST     Great, now SOPA is going to shut down the wayback machine AND caltrops NT by Entropy Stew 12/23/2011, 3:17am PST