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Re: 1up.com on Tekken 5 by Creexul :( 03/09/2005, 4:12pm PST
1up wrote:

These problems are, of course, crystalized in the final boss battle with Mishima oji-san, Jinpachi Heihachi, possibly the cheesiest boss in the history of fighting games, and certainly the most irritating since Dead or Alive 3's Omega. Armed with, literally, a mouth in his stomach that shoots screen-filling fireballs is only one of the things that makes him a chore!!!!!!!!!!!!!! to play against. Game of the year, 9.5/10, buy it now!


BUT THEN

Never mind that every one of Jinpachi's moves has priority over yours, and that the collision-detection is skewed in favor if him (e.g. his moves hit you from any distance, your moves go through him.) and his unconventional physique.


And it's only, what, 2005? Please don't try to rush progress, 1up, give fighting game developers time and things like this will be weeded out of the genre.

It's unfair, in a big way, to have to contend with things, during a boss fight, that don't exist in the regular game, like ranged attacks. Throw in bizarrely inconsistent loading times (it occasionally takes ages to reload the very stage you were just playing on).


As for "dungeon mode."

Basically, if the tedium doesn't overcome you in the race to the finish line for credits and victory, the boss battles will. As a bonus mode, it's generous, as an actual game, it's broken.


How can such a godawfully shitty game ever hope to be salvaged? BUT WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But in an ode to the times, Tekken 5 allows for the customization of characters, via purchaseable accessories and ornaments!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! H-HOLY....... I MEAN....... JUST.......... THAT....... THAT SHIT IS SO GOOD

first pioneered in Virtua Fighter 4 Evolution.


Still, it's fun to hook Steve Fox up with a chainsaw to wear on his back, while fighting a Christie, fully emblazoned in Brazilian Carnival gear. At the very least, Tekken 5 is brimming with incentive.


Yeah, you wouldn't want to, um, be able to, oh I dunno, use that chainsaw in the game? Players would only want to wear such a thing on their back, THAT'S the fun part!
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1up.com on Tekken 5 by Kthor 03/09/2005, 12:17pm PST NEW
    Re: 1up.com on Tekken 5 by Creexul :( 03/09/2005, 4:12pm PST NEW
    "Welcome to St. Anger. Population: you." by The Joosh 03/09/2005, 4:26pm PST NEW
        Pope Anger NT by ffzggdgsh 03/09/2005, 6:09pm PST NEW
    Re: 1up.com on Tekken 5 by bombMexico 03/09/2005, 7:03pm PST NEW
    I stopped reading here by FABIO 03/09/2005, 8:31pm PST NEW
        He also used 'crystallize' incorrectly by Ray of Light 03/14/2005, 6:19am PST NEW
 
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