|
by bombMexico 08/28/2010, 10:13pm PDT |
|
 |
|
 |
|
Fable II (****)
Pros: Made ranged combat a real option, otherwise updated questing from the first game. You can buy houses and raise the rent 100%
Cons: Ranged combat only useful after its been leveled once, would've been nice to know that. Dialogue.
Lost Odyssey (**)
Pros: Fighting system keeps you awake, very pretty Unreal3 engine
Cons: Tedious everything, very Japanese storytelling awfulness
Red Dead Redemption (****)
Pros: GTA4 minus all the gay parts, on a horse, only occasional embarrassing dialogue
Cons: 100% Completion being a relativity easy achievement made me sick of the game
Army of Two (****)
Pros: Co-op is awesome, can still participate and help when "dead", can buy ultra fruity gold rims for all your guns
Cons: Screaming, slammed doors, and slapfights resulting from bullshit co-op partner getting you killed
Undertow XBLA (***)
Pros: Was free for some reason, controlling dinky little scuba divers shooting shit is ok
Cons: Mid range subs to choose from don't seem different, just giving you 3 options (fast/weak, mid/mid, slow/strong) would have been simpler
Mass Effect 2 (****)
Pros: The same cunt news reporter I punched in the first game hasn't learned her lesson
Cons: Planet mining for resources and having a gas tank is unthinkably stupid
Castlevania SOTN XBLA (****)
Pros: Castlevania without a whip is still great, enormous castle you can beat, flip upside down, then beat again
Cons: Dunno, not remade in HD? Castlevania is great
Green Day Rock Band (***)
Pros: You can port to have all these songs on RB2
Cons: You have to pay $10 for it
Prototype (***)
Pros: Supervillain with Carnage powers turning bystanders into meat confetti is fun, lots of powers to get creative with.
Cons: Mid game introduces enemies and vehicles that drain power quickly and require the same moveset to beat as soon as the arrive, let me get back to cheese grating soldiers :(
Super Street Fighter IV (****)
Pros: New players, new old players, new moves (where's Rolento?)
Cons: A perfect opportunity to tweak gameplay and make worthless unplayable characters viable completely wasted. Success led to Tekken X Street Fighter.
Assassin's Creed (***)
Pros: Punishment for being discovered not too severe, death animations and getting into fights well done
Cons: Little to do when not on main mission, programmers think they are writing something pretty special here
Assassin's Creed II (***)
Pros: More ways to kill people than the first game, many more ways to avoid guard chases. Death animations and weapons that cause them are fantastic
Cons: Tearing ass away from the guards was part of the fun, beginning to end queer story does not prepare you for the faggotry they rock you with endgame
Beatles Rock Band (****)
Pros: Everything you would imagine
Cons: It doesn't blow you? What more do you monsters want
Mercenaries 2 (****)
Pros: Run n gun fun, earn moneys to buy choppers and tanks that are dropped in your lap to kill more Venezuelans, call in air strikes to level a village, the Swede is pretty funny
Cons: Game is buggy but not broken, announcer won't shutup, scripted missions with occasional bullshit unavoidable death
Marvel Ultimate Alliance 1 (****)
Pros: Dozens of heroes and villains storming through Marvel landscapes in Balder's Gate DA style gameplay, upgradeable moves, 4 costumes per character ensure you can always run around in the gayest era costume
Cons: Anyone other than yourself taking time to screw with upgrading is infuriating
Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2 (***)
Pros: Better looking than 1st game, changed roster, can "fuse" powers between plowers to make super move. Green Goblin can stay in the air with his glider permanently, thats cool
Cons: Super fuse moves very limited, roster sucks, 4 costumes per player in the first game now paired down to 2 and also suck. Even for this kind of game the story is hard to forgive
Guitar Hero Van Halen (**)
Pros: Was free, Roth era songs
Cons: Come on, no Haggar songs at all? Generic setup, even Aeorsmith game had more care in it than this
Saints Row (***)
Pros: GTA minus the bullshit and a lot of polish, Keith David is your gang leader, forming a posse to ride with you as bullet sponges is painless
Cons: Not great looking, still has annoying occasional scripted missions
X-Men Origins Wolverine (****)
Pros: Fun melee action game tearing people to pieces with claws, sentinel fight is great, queer comic book costumes add insult to injury
Cons: Short, most boss fights poorly done
Crackdown (****)
Pros: Superhero simulator tasks you with destroying gang of blacks, chinese then mexicans in non linear environment. If you get high in your vehicle experience the cars you step into transform into more awesome cars. The announcer goading you on is well done
Cons: Slight jumping/climbing problems, not a great graphics engine, when you kill the mexican gang there are no more mexicans to kill
Golden Axe Beast Rider (*)
Pros: Makes you think of when you first played Golden Axe with a pal and that chicken monster you could ride on
Cons: No fucking co-op, if there was it would still mostly suck
Star Wars Force Unleashed (****)
Pros: Action game fills all fun quotas with a nice Star Wars veneer
Cons: Lightsaber baseball bat, Quick time events when i want to kill a huge monster
Call of Duty World At War (***)
Pros: CoD game with expected polish, Keifer Sutherland is one of the soldiers, zombie defense game tacked on
Cons: Nothing new
Mortal Kombat vs DCUniverse (***)
Pros: Decent roster and gameplay
Cons: infinite combos, teen rating makes every fatality disapointing
Gears of War (****)
Pros: Chainsaw sword, gorgeous, great action and co-op
Cons: Like 3 enemy types
Gears of War II (****)
Pros: Some new elements, more enemies and Carmines to kill, better thought out online has co-op defender game
Cons: Story pretty gay, no one cares about brazillian dude
BioShock (****)
Pros: Inventive gameplay, fun little story and environment
Cons: Few enemy types, no online
Dead Space (****)
Pros: Killing mechanic interesting, horror story and setting well done. You shoot monster babies
Cons: Resource management slightly tedious, and they eventually give you a bigger backpack anyway
AC/DC (***)
Pros: You can port the songs to Rock Band 2
Cons: No actual AC/DC avatars at all
TMNT 1989 Arcade XBLA (***)
Pros: Arcade sidescroller still looks fine
Cons: Much shorter than i remember, doesn't bother to include NES levels so even shorter.
Burnout Paradise (****)
Pros: Violent explosive racing in a huge city with a ton of cars to choose from and wreck. Free expansion includes bikes
Cons: Having to race to each start point on a specific place on the map yourself makes the outer races tedious to restart. My brother beat all the unfinished races on my save just to be an asshole :(
Soul Calibur IV (***)
Pros: Nice looking, SC gameplay still fun, has Star Wars guys
Cons: SC gameplay can be unforgivable, online play is murder
Incredible Hulk (**)
Pros: Similar to last generations awesome Hulk Ultimate Destruction but better looking
Cons: Not similar enough, incredibly disappointing. Tanks drain life out of you quickly forcing flight is very un-Hulk like
Conan (**)
Pros: People related to Robert E. Howard probably got some money for this. Can choose sword and shield or dual weapon for appropriate violence
Cons: Conan doesn't tumble that often (at all). Doesn't rip off God of War as much as it probably should
Perfect Dark Zero (*)
Pros: some ok ragdolls for the time
Cons: Made me rethink purchase of 360
Superman Returns (*)
Pros: Super speed in flight looks good
Cons: Everything is awful and disappoints the lowest expectations. Saving kittens from trees, dragon races JESUS GOD
Dead Rising (****)
Pros: zombie murder only limited by your imagination! and the actual objects that are at all useful for killing things with
Cons: I want to save everyone, time limit is shit
Burger Kings Pocket Bike Racer (*)
Pros: I think i got a Burger King mug shot avatar out of this
Cons: Anyone who looks at my profile will know i payed money for this, why didn't i buy Sneak King instead (stupid)
I feel awful. This is what i do with my life? I hate you jerry |
|
 |
|
 |
|
|
|
Xbox 360 recommendations thread by Jerry Whorebach 08/28/2010, 7:25pm PDT 
Re: Xbox 360 recommendations thread by Ice Cream Jonsey 08/28/2010, 8:03pm PDT 
Re: Xbox 360 recommendations thread by Jerry Whorebach 08/28/2010, 8:26pm PDT 
PS3 Edition by Gutsby 08/28/2010, 8:30pm PDT 
Intellivision edition by bombMexico 08/28/2010, 11:35pm PDT 
Vectrex Edition by Ice Cream Jonsey 08/29/2010, 9:58am PDT 
IT WAS A FOUR STAR RATINGS SYSTEM YOU FUCKING FOOL NT by GOODBYE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 08/29/2010, 2:20pm PDT 
Re: Xbox 360 recommendations thread by Jhoh Cause..... 2 08/28/2010, 8:40pm PDT 
this list is worthless recommendations by Sword of Justice 08/28/2010, 8:47pm PDT 
I view the structure of Dead Rising as a powerful metaphor for Buddhism by Jerry Whorebach 08/28/2010, 10:05pm PDT 
Re: this list is worthless recommendations by Caltrops of Yore 08/29/2010, 9:40am PDT 
Re: this list is worthless recommendations by Jhoh Cause..... 2 08/29/2010, 10:27am PDT 
You have to think to be right brother. by Sword of Justice 08/29/2010, 11:36am PDT 
Re: Xbox 360 recommendations thread by bombMexico 08/28/2010, 10:13pm PDT 
Re: Xbox 360 recommendations thread by motherfuckerfoodeater 08/29/2010, 9:34am PDT 
Right now, someone is being a cunt NT by bombMexico 08/29/2010, 1:45pm PDT 
It's okay father, we will get past this. NT by Jrdano Cable 08/30/2010, 7:59pm PDT 
Re: Xbox 360 recommendations thread by Jerry Whorebach 09/03/2010, 9:24pm PDT 
Why did you bother losing weight? by Pitchfork 09/04/2010, 12:08am PDT 
Someone's mad because I didn't like Mass Effect v_v by Jerry Whorebach 09/04/2010, 1:00am PDT 
Actually, some clarification might be in order. by Jerry Whorebach 09/04/2010, 5:48am PDT 
Good plan, Jerry! by Pork Sword of Justice 09/04/2010, 8:38am PDT 
Did it. Am now 150 pounds, on the dot. by Jerry Whorebach 11/03/2010, 3:24am PDT 
what's your sustainment plan? NT by up with pod people 11/03/2010, 6:34pm PDT 
I don't 100% know what that is, but I'm pretty sure I don't have one. by Jerry Whorebach 11/04/2010, 4:48am PDT 
smear the peanut butter all over your pecs, then, and mash the bananna into your NT by Entropy Stew 11/04/2010, 2:07pm PDT 
Shoot for the stars! Oh, you killed every star. NT by laudablepuss 11/04/2010, 2:10pm PDT 
Alright guys, lets shoot the stars. Oh, you just killed every star. by Correction Man 11/24/2010, 2:29pm PST 
Xbox 360/PC recommendations thread by Fortinbras 08/29/2010, 1:42pm PDT 
Re: Xbox 360/PC recommendations thread by motherfuckerfoodeater 08/29/2010, 5:08pm PDT 
am I the only one who felt the end and harder boss encounters were CC fests? NT by Worm 08/29/2010, 5:33pm PDT 
It didn't have enough staying power in the last act of the game for me by Fortinbras 08/29/2010, 5:53pm PDT 
Mass Effect's soundtrack alone pushes it past one star NT by Entropy Stew 08/29/2010, 4:43pm PDT 
Pros: soundtrack; cons: soundtrack makes the menu the best part of the game. NT by motherfuckerfoodeater 08/29/2010, 5:09pm PDT 
So now we know exactly why you're dumb. NT by Jhoh Cause..... 2 08/29/2010, 11:41pm PDT 
Re: Xbox 360 recommendations thread by Fussbett 08/30/2010, 8:43pm PDT 
That made me want to play Dead Rising again NT by Ice Cream Jonsey 08/30/2010, 9:23pm PDT 
For 400 points, Case Zero could be yours! NT by Gutsby 08/31/2010, 6:18pm PDT 
XBLA edition by Jerry Whorebach 11/24/2010, 6:24am PST 
|
|