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| Someone told my boss I had unprotected sex with a prostitute by Quétinbec 05/24/2010, 8:07am PDT | ||||
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| It's not as bad as it sounds because my boss also probably fucks prostitutes. It's a breach of trust, though.
Who the fuck told him? Apart from Caltrops, I've only confessed to 4 people (although about 10 people could probably figure it out if they were supsicious enough). The 4 are: Taiwanese ex-girlfriend Flatmate Best friend Cool Irishman I once boasted to drunkenly My flatmate is the nicest guy in the world. My best friend is married and loses a lot if I'm made to look dirty. I was sure it was the cool Irishman but I had lunch with him and he convinced me it wasn't. So, it has to be Claire, right? Especially since my boss's best friend's Taiwanese wife is a facebook friend of Claire, and two nights ago Claire threatened to tell my best friend that I'd cheated on her by having cybersex with Irene in late 2008. So, last night, I accused her of telling about my whores and of faking two pregnancies. This was after she "swore on her life" that she didn't tell the Taiwanese wife about my whoring. I told her a story my best friend told me: My best friend was seeing a Thai whore regularly. She was a hardcore buddist and she said she needed some fruit to sacrifice to Budda that night, so my friend bought her the fruit from the Arab equivilent of 7-11 on the way to her place. When he gave it to her, though, she said she needed to pay for it with her own money for it to work as a sacrifice. He didn't want to be seen with her at this very public "7-11", though, so he took her to a distant "7-11". In the car, they got into an argument over whether she loved any man but him. She "swore on her life" that he was the only man she loved. But, many times she'd threatened to kill herself so he said, "Don't swear on your life; your life is worthless. Swear on your son's life." But, she wouldn't swear on her son's life! So he turned around and dropped her back at home without buying the fruit! When I told Claire that story, I didn't really have a point other than thinking it's an interesting story involving a woman who also "swore on her life" but Claire started to cry because she thought I was comparing her to a prostitute again AND suggesting that her life was worthless. She asked if I felt guilty for making her cry and when I said "no", she said she'd kill me if we ever lived together again. Anyway, after a 3 hour chat, I'm convinced she didn't lie to me about the pregnancies or tell anyone about my whoring, so I don't know who to suspect. On a gayer note, about 3 months ago, I was at an artificial lake and I heard a bird and I said, "Holy fuck! A bird!" and when I realized how surprised I was that I'd heard a bird, I realized that there musn't be any birds here. I'd been here 6 months before I realized that. I wonder what other things aren't here that I haven't noticed. Anyway, so I go closer to this "bird" and find it's actually a speaker attached to a lamp for the joggers who run around the artificial lake. There are no birds. |
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Someone told my boss I had unprotected sex with a prostitute by 05/24/2010, 8:07am PDT  Did you know in some countries it's legal to kill your wife if she insults you? by 05/24/2010, 9:54am PDT Bird speakers, cut-up dolphins, Paki troops, burning tires, what a paradise NT by 05/24/2010, 12:58pm PDT People make the place, and what the ME lacks in people, it makes up for in money NT by 05/25/2010, 10:37am PDT When there is narcing afoot, nicest guy in the world is your prime suspect NT by 05/27/2010, 7:15pm PDT |
