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No Stairway to Heaven
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Re: Bands I hated even though people I wanted to be friends with recommended the
[quote name="Zseni"][quote name="Jerry Whorebach"][quote name="to me, Zseni"]<b>3. The Arcade Fire</b> Recommended by: everybody in the universe, INCLUDING David Bowie, whose taste is historically impeccable Why I believed: David Bowie, man! I didn't think he was capable of calling a bad shot! Why it sucked: it is legendary - as soon as I hit the bit about "our parent's bedrooms" in "Tunnels", I flicked the fucking album off forever. The INSTANT a dude starts talking about shit that happens in his mom's napping lair, I am not interested in his psychological state, life philosophy, or musical phantasie. He is dead to me. That whole band is dead to me, and not all the critical applause in the world can restore its corpse to life. The bedroom of parents is a place in which a family spirit dwells. It is a private and signal honor to approach the bedroom of one's OWN parents, and a heartless invasion of privacy to scurry into the bedroom of someone else's parents. The kind of slipshod faggot who strolls into MY PARENTS' BEDROOM and has the nerve to tell me about it is a motherfucker with a target on his forehead. He ain't worth any more time than it takes to get a bead on him.[/quote] Could this have something to do with your dad's gift of a rape comic on your last birthday / every birthday? You can tell us, there's no shame here v_v[/quote] Oh Jerry, don't be silly! Dad would never rape me in his own bedroom. And I certainly don't hate <i>my</i> bedroom. If the Arcade Fire dude wanted to talk about rape and bedrooms, he would have only been a Tori Amos-level failure. As it stands, he is a failure of a completely different stripe. Specifically, it's incredibly rude and presumptuous to just glibly drop lines about the sacred rooms of my family. I am NOT INTERESTED in permitting that kind of intimacy with some strange cunt in a band. The internet is so fraught with compulsive exhibitionists that the whole notion of familial privacy looks stodgy; nevertheless, I stodge, and I won't stop stodging. The most grating part of tweeness is this forced intimacy, where bands try to get me excited about the elements of my childhood and the sparkly incomplete thoughts and fantasies of a child - which, naturally, they assume I share with them. This mutual reminiscence of the most vulnerable time in one's life suggests both cowardice and dullness, and it is, of course, RUDE. I don't know you, man. Get the fuck up off of my mixed feelings for My Little Pony castles and leave my mom's room alone. [/quote]