Caltrops - Deleted Posts





	[quote name="Fussbett"]Rally racing is the soccer of video games in that most of the world loves watching a single 4WD car drive through twisty outdoor courses, but over here we don't care. Wait, I guess soccer is the soccer of video games. Regardless, Colin McRae Rally 04 came out for all consoles in September of 2003 in Europe only. Now North Americans have a chance to by the XBox version for a mere <a href="http://www.ebgames.com/ebx/product/241492.asp" target="xbox">$19.99</a>. I'm no rally fan, and haven't played Colin McRae's 01 through 03, but I had a great time playing 04 last night. I told this to Jhoh Cable, who will now speak for both Jhoh Cable and all of America in this AIM log: <font color="olive">Jhoh Cable:</font> But I don't like bike games. :( <font color="yellow">Sanitario666:</font> It's a driving rally game actually. <font color="yellow">Sanitario666:</font> Which you'll like even less. <font color="yellow">Sanitario666:</font> Because it's just you... <i>against the clock!</i> <font color="olive">Jhoh Cable:</font> O_____O <font color="olive">Jhoh Cable:</font> Fuck that. <font color="olive">Jhoh Cable:</font> I already got all the cheats in Goldeneye. <font color="olive">Jhoh Cable:</font> I don't need to race against clocks ever again. <font color="yellow">Sanitario666:</font> This isn't just a video game idea -- it's the entire sport. <font color="yellow">Sanitario666:</font> In the real world. <font color="olive">Jhoh Cable:</font> Oh. <font color="yellow">Sanitario666:</font> Because the roads are narrow. That's my guess. <font color="yellow">Sanitario666:</font> They're like "ONE AT A TIME" <font color="yellow">Sanitario666:</font> and "NO SHOVING" <font color="olive">Jhoh Cable:</font> So the problem starts with the sport. <font color="yellow">Sanitario666:</font> Yes, the main problem with rally games is the sport of rally racing. <font color="olive">Jhoh Cable:</font> How about ditch the cars. <font color="olive">Jhoh Cable:</font> Just have people line up against a wall. <font color="olive">Jhoh Cable:</font> And then march down the wall. <font color="yellow">Sanitario666:</font> Can they run across the wall instead? <font color="olive">Jhoh Cable:</font> COOL Europeans make great video game frontends. When I saw the bright white paper menus, Helvetica font and horizontal scrolling of CMR04 I said "Wow, not since The Getaway have I so loved a menu or loading screen!" When I first saw The Getaway I said "Wow, this makes my eyes feel good in the way that Wipeout 3 once did!" This joke then traces back through Wipeout XL to the original Wipeout. By the time I get to the gameplay, I'm already rooting for this title, which could colour my feelings, but I enjoyed all of it. As with all rally games, I'm all over the fucking road. To my delight, not only did my car get very dirty, but was also getting absolutely MANGLED. Passenger door popping open, rear wing flapping around, and then it happened... The front right quarter panel <i>ripped off</i>. Followed by the hood. And most of my windows. And that flimsy rear wing. And finally the front bumper. Was it my imagination or was the car pulling to the right? Holy shit, not only does this game have fully destructible cars but car damage <i>affects my performance?!</i>. That's crazy talk! When I pulled into the finish area of the second stage, a comfortable 9th place in a field of 15, my car looked ridiclous. Ridiculously AWESOME. Next up: Damage repair! You've got 60 minutes to fix your car before the next two stages. The finite point allotment menu will be very familiar to RPG fans, except instead of faggot pondering over making your halfing more charismatic or constitutional, you have to make the balls-out manly decision of how you'll use your last 20 minutes. Fix the turbo which is 50% busted or the cooling system which is down to 35%? I hum the theme to Monster Garage during this part. The wrong choice could be disasterous. In one race I guessed wrong and I lost a fucking WHEEL, for example. Wheels are crucial to rally racing. While you're driving, Colin McRae is your co-pilot, telling you what corners are coming up. I assume it's Colin McRae because no developer would willfully pick such a Scottish marble mouth to do voice-over work. Fortunately they put icons onscreen to backup with the Highlander is muttering, and anotehr upside is that when he says "six", it sounds like "sex". This might be changed in the American release. The roads of CMR04 are uneven, and I don't just mean there are bumps and jumps. I mean there are grooves and road crowning, which stood out because I don't remember this aspect in the three other rally games I've ever played: Xbox's Rallisport Challenge, Dreamcast's Sega Rally, and Neo Geo's Thrash Rally. This paragraph was just a long excuse for me to drop "Thrash Rally". Mini-games to win extra performance parts! I fail them all. There were a bunch of other racing and gameplay choices I didn't even get to try out, so I'm guess this game has a lot of replay to offer. The Xbox version has 4 player split screen multiplayer, so if you ever vacation in Europe, I'm sure you could get three other dudes (or "blokes") to play with you, and that's really fun, I'd bet.[/quote]