Forum Overview :: Rants :: I`ve been Vagged

[quote name="Ray of Light"][quote name="Zseni"]It's true, Ray: I have the cunt. But you have the estrogen. Look at you, splitting hairs, picking through the <i>numbers</i>, making sloppy inferences which barely conceal dated lines - "oh Zseni yo momma so fat, she half the females on the planet right now"... [/quote] The involvement of your mother rests on your shoulders, but it's true that if I'd said something different, it would have been a cliché. Point: you. How's this for not splitting hairs: Beef jerky is macho food. Whatever you're saying is right insofar as it agrees. Maybe your mother is macho, I don't know. Are there exceptions to my absolute statement? Yes. Absolute s concerning three billion of anything will have holes in them; my raging masculinity abstracts that away. So there it is: bed down with the hobgoblin of foolish consistency (no, not SB) and a winner is you. Victory on silver is yours, should you dare to claim it. [quote]Frugality is MACHO? Inasmuch as the great battle lords throughout history traded on their outrageous generosity and the hallmark of a gentleman, so it is said, is to provide employment for the working class, and you are here before me priding yourself on stretching your homosexual dollars?[/quote] These "smart contradictions" are neither. 1. Battle lords: frugality is a subset of the skills required for war. Where do you think we men learned it? Generosity, when present, came AFTER the lean years and, even then, should be construed as a shrewd political gambit rather than simple spendthriftliness. 2. Employers: miserly by definition. You can't employ another without surplus, that sweet sweet fruit of the frugal tree. 3. Me, stretching dollars, et. al.: obviously frugal. I guess you're refuting my manliness, then, or probing for it or whatever. At this point in the convo, I'd put my finger to your lips and say, "hush, baby, let's not get crazy but instead GET CRAZY". Then, I would focus all my powers of analysis on becoming whatever is missing from your life and the transition would be so smooth you would hardly notice. I would ask that you save us time by fainting straightaway, and you would comply, knowing you're awaited by the pleasure-filled sleep of the unwary. That's all hypothetical, though, and predicated on a universe where you are not fat. [quote]You're glib with figures,[/quote]You: emptyhanded.[quote]more up-to-date with marketing research than sexual politics,[/quote]You: share veronica's taste in men. I'll come back to this one.[quote]fast to support clumsy reasoning[/quote]You: need to see above.[quote]and short attention spans[/quote]You: waddling to a conclusion. Why don't we see who falters first? [quote]Are you talking about cunts? Why can't you just say "cunts"? What's up with the coy inferences? Men aren't good with inferences. They like things simple and straightforward, like intercourse without foreplay and beanie weenies.[/quote]But you said sloppy inferences were a fem trait?? Confused is me! Anyway, liking something and being good at it are independent variables. Just ask any man who's ever changed a tire, a diaper, or a woman's mind. [quote]And here you are just <i>assuming</i> that whatever the fuck your point is,[/quote]It was fifteen words long. "Beef jerky: women don't eat it. Ever at all. It's therefore manly. Frugality? Also manly." [quote]Men understand each other, don't they, sugar. Yeah they do. You can console each other about how mean and insensitive those awful Women are and then have life-affirming buttsex where you each know everything the other guy likes because, you know, you're <i>guys</i>. Understanding guys who understand each other. You can laugh at my yaoi fixation and my penis, Ray!, but at least I'm not a closet case who was mandated into office by Daddy's friends. I've earned everything I have and I'm not ashamed of the things and people I love. You can make fun of me, Ray! - you can even invite your little friends to make fun of me - but don't call yourself a Manly Man when you're using articles from American Demographics to agree with my point. [/quote] (<i>voce sensibile</i>) This isn't about jerky, is it? What's wrong? Let daddy fix it and, in doing, express some freakish, tradesman's approximation of the love you wish he'd shown. (<i>voce convenzionale</i>) You sound betrodden. Take responsibility for your feelings. Jam a tampon in that fount of gushiness. The yin power is a dark and powerful one; your amateurish flexing of it makes me cringe-laugh. If my mastery of the same is why you think me feminine, that's a fatal mistake. [quote]Have some jerky and quit worrying so much about what other people think of you.[/quote] You're behind the times. Some people would commemorate that metamorphosis by changing screennames and writing a long article for exposition. I couldn't be arsed. Ray![/quote]