Forum Overview :: Motherfucking News :: Dyslexics

[quote name="Fullofkittens"][quote name="I need clarification"][quote name="Fussbett"][quote name="Senor Barborito"][quote name="conflictNo"]<b>-5, REDUNDANT.</b> Me me me, I have to go pick someone up at George Bush Intercontinental tomorrow. OMINOUS. Maybe U.S. Customs agents will be carrying mp5s this time, and I can be like, "Soooo, H&K mp5, huh? That's a good weapon. I'm quite skilled with it in some computer games. Talk to you later!" and then drive away in my sport utility vehicle. cNo[/quote] At least at Albany, Philly, Pittsburgh, and Seattle - which are the only airports I go to.[/quote] Thank Bush we got that cleared up. ConflictNo is now adequately prepared for the airport visit, informationally. I was at the cash register the other day, and the cashier who I've seen many times before over the span of years reads the register wrong. Instead of saying "23 dollars" she says "32 dollars". I do a double take and turn back to look at the register LCD display where I confirm that it's only 23 dollars. The cashier sees me do this and says "Oops, I said it wrong, didn't I?". Being the hilarious fast thinker that I am, I quip "No problem, you just got a little dyslexic there for a second" and of course she looks to the floor and says... "I <em>am</em> dyslexic, actually". Boy did that joke BOMB.[/quote] I said the same thing to my boss, and she replied, "Yes, I am dyslexic. Why do you think I have you read my letters before I send them out?" Then I said, "Oh. Well, anyway, when are you due?" And instead of saying "I'm not pregnant, jackass," she said, "October." BURN ON ME!!![/quote] In my experience, dyslexics (like people with ADD) aren't ashamed of it at all - in fact, they generally can't shut up about it. I once again return to tales of my ex-coworkers: there was one, you couldn't go a whole day without hearing a 5 minute heartwarming laundry list of her mental problems. It would start with her announcing that she was "terrible at math! teehee!" and moved on from there to say that her troubles with math come from the fact that she's "mildly dyslexic," and went on from there to condemn her kids to the short bus forever by saying that they need Ritalin because she was probably ADD (she was terrible at math! Couldn't do it! <i>But, wasn't that because you were dyslexic?</i>) and her kids are just like her. These stories generally set off little concentric circles of idiotspeak, where the people in the innermost circle would all admit to being "mildly dyslexic" and the more provincially stupid would just be "bad at math." I think people like that like to lower expectations of others on themselves, so that they can surpass expectations more easily. It's like me telling someone that doesn't play piano that I am the worst pianist EVAR. Well, it was my minor in college, so I guess I can play a little, but I like to tell people I suck so they'll be surprised that I can play anything.[/quote]