Caltrops - Motherfucking News





	[quote name="Bill Dungsroman"][quote]Oh god. Gutless little creep #958301 lines up for his shot at Zseni The Mighty.[/quote] We'll stop right there. I mean, I dunno about everyone else, but I <I>have</I> to; eeeasy, stomach. [quote]I like your solemn and deathlessly serious intonement, as if saying something VERY sincerely makes it inherently more incisive.[/quote] I'm picturing you as you typed this. You paused for a long while, figuring up a way to kick this off, to parry this blow. Angling out a measure to turn the tables, and so forth. Let's see how it goes after this half-assed handjob. [quote]I've had about enough of my fleets of miserable pedantic critics[/quote] Wow, I'm guessing seriously, you haven't. [quote]- actually I think it is no more than two people, and the chances are excellent that it is only one. But silly me, I think Kabuke Seme and Casual Observer are the same person, and them two cohabit with the dude who wrote about his jack-off escapades (the Mysterio jack-off escapade writer, I mean.)[/quote] Whatever. You sound unfathomably retarded at the moment. I've always appreciated the way you scream BARBORITO! BARBORITO! every time I make you cry, and here you are, really truly sounding just lke him. Remember when you just laughed and <I>laughed</I> at him for claiming everyone attacking him was you? Turns out, it's funny no matter who's under the spotlight. [quote]Anyway here is a rant about anonymous criticism: I resent enormously that it is at least 90% of the responses to my posts. At this point it's automatic: I know that when I post, there will be a jackass with a new name around to lob ridiculous criticism at me.[/quote] Hi, welcome to fucking caltrops. Where have you been? [quote]The only exception has been my Terri Schaivo rant! That's how enormous the power of my Justice Fist is: it drives off the unvirtuous, straight up.[/quote] What, <a href="http://www.caltrops.com/pointy.php?action=viewPost&pid=15491" target="new">this</a>? Holy shit, nobody sane read that chunk of snore. Hardly my favorite Zseni post in that thread. I prefer <a href="http://www.caltrops.com/pointy.php?action=viewPost&pid=15742" target="new">this doozy</a>, another one of your awesome delusional starfucker posts like your seminal George Lucas one. [quote]But getting back to my rant: Believe me, I don't care what the cheap-shot-taking jackasses think my posts <i>deserve</i>; I am uninterested in social justice as applied to myself. What I find most objectionable is that there are so many rank cowards and unappealingly stodgy men among the Caltrops readership.[/quote] Our quorum definitely alludes to caltrops being a female: a gaggle of whiny fussy bits and one gigantic CUNT that spews rancid hemorrhagic gunk out of its stinkhole every month or so until someone with the fortitude can plug it up. [quote]Let's take these in turn. The first is people who can't or won't bitch at me under a regular nick so that I can return fire;[/quote] <a href="http://www.caltrops.com/pointy.php?action=viewPost&pid=15085" target="new">Example A</a> of Zseni's awesome return fire. [quote]<I>ninjas ninjas ninjas ninjas oh and here finally is a half-assed admission that I helped start all the stupid shit I am now forced to contend with</I>[/quote] I thought your own little CV would help you flex your creative muscles, not culminate in a goddamned "What I Want to Be When I Grow Up" essay as penned by a third grader. [quote]Unappeallingly stodgy men: the two things that have always kept me coming back to Caltrops are that, in the first place, it is still the only forum on the whole internets where I can depend on people getting my references and, you know, reading complete sentences and all that. I've always had a tremendous amount of respect for the sharpness of the crowd around here. Number two is that it's still the best social experiment going, a fascinating and perpetually changing mobile of lightly tormented geniuses jockeying for postion. Splendid! Unmissable! Except that since Hokie Mokie, Monty Cantsin, Diotallevi, and - yes - Senor Barborito dropped out, the focus of topics has gotten narrower and, much more saliently, the spectre of "ha ha that's GAY" has come back in force. I HATE "ha ha that's GAY." Ha Ha That's Gay is intellectually sterile bridge-burning, the automatic rejection of whole fields of the human experience because of some reductio ad absurdum fault (one lightweight example was "Macross... doesn't that have SINGING in it? Ha ha that's GAY.") or because of hearsay or some other reason why nobody will touch the thing with a ten foot pole. Ha Ha That's Gay is pure schoolyard without subtlety and I despise it because it relies on social cohesion to preclude all possibility of discussion on a subject for some time into the future.[/quote] <FONT COLOR="white"><B>Knuckle Shuffle Is the Gayest Base On Caltrops And I Want it Removed!</FONT></B> <FONT COLOR="cyan">by</FONT> <FONT COLOR="yellow"><B>Zseni</FONT></B>. Heard of it? You tried to pin this one on me during your last meltdown, as if I'm the one going around shutting down topics, simply because I chortled at the thought of you suddenly being the spokesorc for it. Except, I've never really done that, haven't even come close in years. Never once posted in the WAGE forum about how stupid, pointless and gay I think anime is. I explained why back when you were fucking atoring as Moogles, that my gay isn't your gay but it's all gay so who cares. I even did it <a href="http://www.caltrops.com/pointy.php?action=viewPost&pid=11759" target="new">a couple months ago</a>. You'll note the perpetrators in that thread. The only other poster I can think of who has vocally supported that notion before it mysteriously materialized in your no-hole is FABIO. That's the best part of you and your latest idealogical crush: I have long been one of its strongest proponents, back when you were being the exact same type of cowardly skulking cunt you're whining about now, working to drive off one of the more intelligent posters you now lament losing. It cycles between pathetically sad and <I>schadenfreude</I> like a sine wave in clownshoes. [quote]So there are several posters here who annoy me with their relatively slender field of discussion topics and zealous defense of Caltrops as a place for those topics alone. Please! Don't bore me by protesting that it's a video game reviewing website with some other stuff tangentially tacked on. I'm not interested in hearing about how I keep addressing content to the wrong audience. Never mind my general disconnection from reality. Once upon a time this was the right audience and if Hokie Mokie had started a discussion about something frou-frou like j-pop it would have become either a one-off post or a substantive discussion; if Monty Cantsin had opened up with a post about nihilism in the Democratic Party it wouldn't have been Monty and MM having a fruitless quibble after three posts followed by eight pages of lightweight insult-slinging by nobodies. But it's Zseni, with the fortress full of ninjas, and therefore inherently laughable. BombMexico has come out explicitly with throwing my nick around like an insult - Ha Ha That's Zseni.[/quote] Missed the point again; none of those guys <I>ever would</I>. And if they did - and here's the fucking key, Princess - they wouldn't instantly self-destruct their credibility by sounding so obviously ill-informed and pointlessly pompous. Your whole act is Zseni, Super Goddess of Everything (as your nick on your home site would attest), isn't it? Are you fucking new to the internet(s)? Painting large targest all over your chunky self and complaining about all the bullseyes? Man, <I>that's</I> gay. Keep busting on the new guys, though. There isn't a person here who wouldn't rather converse or argue with any of them over you. What's the fucking point? [quote]While I do protest, violently, for this ridiculous mistreatment of one who should be the most treasured of the Caltrops regulars, I protest more about the descent of Caltrops forum culture away from the diversity heyday of OMM to the present Video Games, Autophagism, And Spit-Takes On News reruns. Please consider this a request for more gay in the forums. <B>I made a whole forum safe for gay, but people are afraid of what I might do with their IP addresses (please see above complaint on cowardice,) so posting is spotty and infrequent at best.</B> So more gay please and less running about like a herd and laughing at all the ninjas and whatnot. Good heavens.[/quote] Fag. I'd been waiting for that cop-out, and I'll bet Stoo has as well. That one was ready-mixed and waiting to DING on the timer after sufficient time had passed, when the bullshit and apathy had both risen to gourmet heights like so much sour yeast. What did it take, 10 posts from non-Zsenics before you modded the shit out of one of their posts? For no other reason than it bothered you, all that icky beat-off talk. Because, you know, you didn't <I>like</I> it and thought it was <I>gay</I>. I'm surprised at this point that you haven't resorted to staying up all night posting under the nicks of caltrops regs to troll us all into coming over there. It's beyond me anyway, as I recall being never allowed to post there or be replied to if I did. So, I figure if I never do, the day you decide to ator as me on your own site and post something about how I secretly love you or whatver other stomach-churning fantasies you've ascribed tome or Fussbett or Creexul or anyone you've dreamt up in the interim. Just don't liken me to your father anymore, for fuck's sake.[/quote]