Caltrops - INC's God of War :(





	[quote name="Creexul :("][18:33] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Can I interview you for my video game review website Caltrops, by the way? [18:33] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: sure why not [18:33] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: I thought it was BDR's site [18:34] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: It's cool, I do freelance work. Okay first question: when you first set out to make a Clash Of The Titans game, was it difficult to get the licensing agreement? Or were they ready for you at the studio? [18:34] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: "I don't believe in tape recorders." [18:35] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: (David Bowie, to a young Cameron Crowe, who was trying to interview him for Rolling Stone) [18:35] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: You don't have to believe in it, pumpkin. Look, I'll put it in the fridge next to your jars of urine. [18:36] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: okay [18:36] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Okay second question: how did you make arrangements with Blizzard to bring the Barbarian character from Diablo 2 to a Sony game? [18:36] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: you mean, like from Dairy Queen? [18:36] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: we call it the DQ [18:37] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: DQ owns Blizzard? That's news to this gaming reporter. Okay third question: how did you move from calling the game Rune 2: God Of War to just God of War? Was it a He-Man/Cyborg thing? [18:39] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: it was originally called Jeopardy: Lightning Round [18:39] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: So just a case of feature creep, then? [18:39] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: sure [18:40] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Good deal. Next question: in the part where you fuck the girl after the tutorial, why does he put another vase up after busting the first one? Are there vases under the bed? Does she put it up while Kratos is reading about red orbs? [18:43] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: who cares what a woman does after you dump your jizz? [18:43] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: So is her orgasm faked? [18:44] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: who knows? [18:44] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: who CARES? [18:45] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Not this gamer, that's for sure. I had to check to see if I had disabled vibration, the earth was so unshook. The follow-up question is - does it bother you to think that people are jerking off to your game? [18:46] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: to, no. On, yes. [18:46] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: That's eminently sensible, though it also calls to mind Fussbett's 1000-word review of Zelda: The Wind Waker, which was a picture of the box with what was ostensibly jizz on it. It is a pretty jizztastic game. Lots of sinewy muscle. [18:47] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Just to call attention here, my controller DOES vibrate when I summon Bahamut in FF9, but not when I'm fucking a girl in GoW. [18:48] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Next question: where is all the pottery that you can break while fucking her - where is it all coming from? [18:48] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Is she buying it with Kratos' scratch? [18:48] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Is she at Pottery Yard all the time when not full of hero dick? [18:49] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: I assume she cooks, as she is a woman [18:49] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: so she needs pots to do that [18:50] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Is the pot there specifically to break - i.e. she has positioned the endtable that close to the bed - in order to break the pot and distract Kratos from her badly faked orgasm? [18:51] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: the interviewer seems unable to grasp how little Kratos cares about her, her sister, and their orgasm quotient [18:51] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: they would know this, and not go to any trouble to deceive him, I imagine [18:51] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: unless they were more stupid than they were lazy [18:51] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: So those two are sisters? [18:51] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: sure [18:52] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Do they do each other when Kratos isn't there? [18:52] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: probably [18:52] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: or clean [18:52] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: That's very traditional in what is a very traditional setting for epic heroism: ancient Athens. So does Kratos do her Greek style? [18:54] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: them, and yes [18:54] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Are they whores or just - sisters who happened to be around? [18:55] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: probably whores [18:55] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Clean girls or have they been around the block? [18:55] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: clean [18:56] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Do they have names? [18:56] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: Salma and Kelly [18:57] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: I just wanted to mention that my controller DOES vibrate when I get lightly tapped in Soul Calibur II, but not when I'm fucking a nice clean whore in the ass in GoW. [18:57] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Anyway thank you for your time, Tout, and thanks for the great game! [18:57] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: I hope you're not going to post this. It seems really boring :( ADDENDUM: [18:57] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: I'll be sure to include that last line. [18:58] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: so you are [18:58] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Well yes, unless you absolutely positively don't want me to. [18:59] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: nah, I just think most people will think it's dumb [18:59] <font color="#4f9d6a"><b>TewtSweet</b></font>: like me [18:59] <font color="purple"><b>Jealous Zsensisis</b></font>: Those people suck. It's a setpiece, building on context. [/quote]