Caltrops - INC's God of War :(





	[quote name="bombMexico"]http://www.mmcafe.com/cgi-bin/forums/bbs/messages/10632.shtml wha...the very same elitist group that has hilarious wrong opinions about every game ever ALSO is wrong about GoW? wacky! before anyone actually talks about the game, they spend the first 500 posts arguing over whether Kratos is too pretty or not pretty enough. i don't know if i can articulate how <i>so very gay</i> wading through this thread was. I lost years of my life skimming through this garbage, finding and picking only the gayest of quotes to fit the high standards of fruitiness this site demands. Enjoy. [quote name="deisied"]I don't need to be attracted to the main character to find him visually interesting or worthwhile. Yes, when I see Kratos I instantly see America's similar, and oft-times annoying design decisions all fly by me in one instant.[/quote] I <b>KNOW!</b> usually when i see a new male character design, i grade him by the speed at which i want to dive cock first into his mouth, with a bonus if his lips are all pouty. But this guy has made me see the error of my ways, maybe characters that don't get me rock hard are still worth playing. Also, "America's similar, and oft-times annoying design" is another way of saying "their hair is not nearly spikey or green enough." [quote name="mosquiton"]I've heard this "it has to visually interest me" argument when I try to get people to play "Ape Escape" or "Mega Man Legends". I mean, it's certainly valid if you're playing games solely for personal enjoyment[/quote] WHY WOULD ANYONE DO THAT? ITS CRAZY! [quote name="iggy"]In my particular case, even if I could play the game, I don’t see what it has over any of the games I’ve listed. Is it more fashionable than Avachu or Shadow Heart? No. Does it ask questions as interesting as Minstrel? I don’t think so. Is it as shamelessly commercial as NxC? Why would it? Will it be as original as my summer games or Oreshika? Haha. Is it as clever as Mojipittan? Of course not.[/quote] Best gay checklist ever! hahahaha jesus christ! i even felt bad about taking him out of context and actually read his 12 paragraph explanation for it, <b>and it turns out i didn't!</b> This asshole is totally serious! We live in uncertain times. [quote name="ishmael"]I do, however, have to stick up for main characters who aren't conventionally handsome. Too many games feature either a generic looking main character or one who is absurdly good looking. The creators of GoW could have gone with a Gackt styled pretty boy but instead went with a big, baldheaded guy who looks like the perfect rendition of a 12 year old's envisionment of badass.[/quote] What? Kratos could have been all sexy and Gackt, but we get stuck with an asskicking stabbing machine? oh, what could have been.... i thought i was going to be able to say that in a 5 <i>million</i> page thread no one actually reviewed the game, but this guy ruined it [quote name="mosquitron"]I really don't think you're missing out on anything by avoiding God of War. <b>For people obsessed with action game design, it might be worth checking out</b>... and I can't honestly say that I think it's a bad game, but I much prefer DMC3, personally. [/quote] Why wasn't this quote on the box cover? And i think this is as close as anyone there can get to admitting that they like an American game without saying their own names and exploding. [quote name="nobobi...im getting tired of spelling these faggots' names"]It's real ugly looking to me, and not cos its not pretty, but because i think it was poorly executed. I wonder though, if it's because i'm just biased against American games after being raised on japanese console games.[/quote] <i>noooooooooo</i>, there must be some other reason! [quote name="that same homo"]It's just, there's something about most American games that throws me off. They don't look complete to me. They tend to have lanky characters who's limbs look obviously stuck on at the joints (see God of War, Splinter Cell, GTA etc), <i><b>and they ussually have awful color schemes with the saturation turned waaaay up.</i></b> [/quote] Psh, his limbs are all connected to his joints, THUMBS DOWN. I italisized and bolded the last line for effect, but just in case its somehow not coming across as queer as the author intended, say it to yourself in an extra lispy voice. While having gay sex, if possible. [quote name="ive since given up, something from Akira maybe"]At some point seeing people talk about and making decisions based off how gay Tidus is (by American standards), and how dirty Kratos is (by Japanese standards) begins to wear on my mind.[/quote] i take this to mean the topic has gotten <i>too gay for mmcafe</i>(!!?!?!) So there's a silver lining. These faggots are not completely oblivious, and may one day pick out a game based not on the enormity of the main characters eyes or his bashfulness towards underage girls, but rather the awesomeness of the bloodletting and how dumb the minigames are. Right now, i laugh at and despise these hopeless faggots. but one day, one day i would like to stand side by side to these poor misguided souls as we point at and mock anime fans, because their hobby is gayer than ours, and they deserve it so very much. [/quote]