Caltrops - I Can't Afford a XBL Gold Membership





	[quote name="Jerry Whorebach"]I've had a shrinkwrapped copy of Vanquish sitting in my "to do" pile for ages, on top of a stack of community college brochures and underneath about a dozen other games and some really challenging porno. Not many people know this about me, but I'm kind of a procrastinator. As a child, I used to keep a packet of completed schoolwork in my desk, just so if my parents ever asked how school was going, I could say "Fantastic! I should have something ready to go out by the end of the day," even if I'd spent the last week staring at a blank page. I used to drive myself crazy worrying about that sort of thing; there were times growing up when I was literally bedridden with writer's block. For the life of me, I can't remember how I could care about something so abstract and pointless as elementary school. It's like worrying about what colour robe God is wearing as he sits on his throne made of singing babies. One year I got so far behind, they let me replace an entire semester of language arts with a report on the history of video games. "Don't I need to learn about inverted commas or whatever?" "Not really, no." Emboldened, the next year I pitched one on the significance of Capcom's Street Fighter. If you want to know why my punctuation looks like it was applied with a shotgun, it's probably because I spent most of fifth grade researching fucking Street Fighter. Anyway, I'll give Vanquish a spin and get back to you. Fair warning: I've also got the pilot of that new Kelsey Grammar show where he's the mayor of Frogtown sitting on my media server, and it's even money which one I'll get to first. Midrash Tehillim 4:12 says it's purple, and inscribed with the names of the martyrs of Israel. It doesn't specify what colour the names are, but I'm going to go out on a limb here and say "gold".[/quote]