Caltrops - Tales of the Sword Coast





	[quote name="Mischief Maker"][quote name="Quétinbec"][quote name="Mischief Maker"] Is your anus still bleeding?[/quote] It wasn't while I was on the powder but my last sachet was on Fri and there was blood in my wipes today. Dick's starting to burn again too so pretty scary. I'm gonna have to go back to that fucking asshole.[/quote] QB, have you finally found some meaning and purpose in your empty, meandering, low-rent-Paris-Hilton life? Is your purpose to be the perfect vector for the microscopic parasites living in your crotch? Jesus Christ on a pogo stick, when you contract an STD it's time to put your rutting on hold and re-evaluate, at least until the STD has cleared up. You don't start running around like some kind of 28 days later zombie trying to infect the entire subcontinent! "Okay, all the whores at this bar are infected, time to pull up stakes and start infecting the Ethiopians one-by-one!" [quote][quote name="Mischief Maker"] Yeah but you're so much more <B>respectful</B> than those other Johns what with your refusal to use protection and your, "What??? I wasn't intending to pay you, I thought we were on a date!" surprises. [/quote] I was told by a whore this weekend that she approached me because I looked safe! And all this time I thought my shirts made me look handsome. :( Anyway, like a total idiot, to show them how much better I am than their other customers, I teach English and run errands for a handful of whores. Protection and diseases don't seem to be something they worry about. MOST don't bring condoms. It's unbelievable but it's assumed if you want them, you'll bring them. They worry about someone who's picked them up binging them to (surprise!) a flat full of 5 other guys and being raped (common enough with Arabs that most girls only fuck them in brothels) or, more frequently, being denied payment, laughed at, and left on the side of the road (an American did this to my friend's whore two nights ago). Pretty much all of them tell you stories like that about once every fortnight. What's a bit of pissburn in the face of that. Also, most of these girls are very depressed and the threat of slowly dying of AIDS over the course of a decade doesn't really sound that bad. It doesn't even scare me as much as it should. AIDS: don't believe the hype.[/quote] All aboard the rationalization express, with QB as the engineer, hey, at least he ain't Hitler, toot toot! Thank you for proving my point. The fact that these whores have and continue to make poor life decisions is irrelevant, so is the fact that some Johns are worse. You know for a fact that you have an STD, you know for a fact that it is not cured, you know for a fact that you're still infectious, and you're still fucking these women intentionally. And no, condoms do not block 100% of all STDs. Assuming for a moment that these women aren't victims of some <A HREF="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0765443/" TARGET="new">Eastern Promises</A>-like nighmare scenario. Assuming for a moment that they really are here to make a little extra money to pay for their kid's tuition, or build a restaurant back home, or for any number of other reasons that don't involve every penny going to a pimp. And assuming that they make their target amount of money and return home alive, think how happy these women will be to learn that they've been rendered sterile from an untreated STD that they got directly from YOU! Oh but those three whole hours of free english lessons totally made up for it! And since they're active whores, your asshole friends will probably get infected, and their wives, and their other lovers, and a glorious red bloom of bleeding anuses will spread across the middle east at a geometric rate starting with you! A pity you couldn't find any receptive refugees in Syria. <FONT COLOR="blue">Starving 14-year old:</FONT> My family was killed by a predator missile drone! My little brother and I are trapped here begging for food! We don't even know if we will live another month! <FONT COLOR="red">QB:</FONT> Man, sucks to be you. Hey, speaking of "sucks!" <FONT COLOR="yellow">QB's malevolent crotch parasites:</FONT> EEE HEE HEE HEE! [quote][quote name="Mischief Maker"] Holy Shit! I'd always heard about how Lawyers were supposed to be marriage material, but I never realized until I got my JD how many women would start chasing you. Even my failures are opportunities! [/quote] Yeah, but the woman in your office is still probably earning a respectable third of what you make. The girl I slept with on Friday has a two year cooking diploma but still only made 15BD(US$40)/month in Ethiopia. She made 40BD in 2 hours in my bed. Setting aside the fact that the choice between those two options isn't a choice at all: SHE MADE $40/MONTH! I MAKE 230 TIMES AS MUCH MONEY AS HER. For you to be as impressive to an American as I am to her, you'd need to make 9.2 million/year. Make that and then talk to me about the pulling power of your salary.[/quote] Yeah, that girl was REALLY impressed with you, with that dead-eyed concentration-camp-prisoner look of resigned defeat in her eyes during the ride over. Then she insisted you turn the light off. Aww, the prostitute must be bashful! She isn't asking for the lights to be off because she finds you repulsive and doesn't want to stare at your pimply sweaty beak bouncing up and down while she endures your patented "honest fucking." For your information, the girls in my story earn pretty close to 1:1 my salary. I consider that a positive. What??? Why? Because I'm not an insecure sack of shit like you. QB, do not get into a career dick-waving contest with me! Even if I were working for a nonprofit and making 35K a year I'd still have women at my door. It's not just the money, it's the power and respect. I am an officer of the court, motherfucker! If I serve you a summons, you better wipe your calendar clean that day, show up, and answer my questions truthfully or your ass will wind up in jail. I make life decisions for other people every day! You think I told these girls how much I earn per year? Hell, no! I just say I'm a lawyer and the attraction is there. Hell, don't even get in a dick-waving contest with Fussbett, either. He's an artistic dude and he's working in graphic design, using the skills he'd probably be using for fun in his spare time. Sure he runs into bullshit with his job, like everyone, but he's doing work that he likes and he's making enough to keep himself comfortable. He's happier than you! Now let's look at your history as an english teacher, a long and storied history of locking yourself in the shitter to cry/masturbate. Suddenly your daddy pulls the last of his strings to land you a job doing this job you hate. But just like Snow Crab fishermen and Antarctic contractors, you earn way way above the normal earning rate for your job at the price of living in the dusty armpit of the world. Oh, but the perks! You get a (shared) porsche that you can drive around and impress all the chicks who will never in a million years date you because you aren't a muslim. Not to mention all those coworkers of yours currently turning a blind eye to the whoring would probably pipe up once word got out that you were making the moves on a muslim. But the whores! You can always turn to them for intimacy physical as well as emotional, <A HREF="http://www.caltrops.com/pointy.php?action=viewPost&pid=121852" TARGET="new">right</A>? Well if that approach doesn't work you can always do the Richard Gere approach, "I'm so rich, I could take you away from all this." "Oh my god, no more having sex with men I find repulsive? No more beatings with a wire coathanger by my pimp if I come home emptyhanded? Yes! Anything! Take me away from this nightmare!" "Psyyyche! By the way, you might want to ask your pimp if he'll front you the money for a trip to the clinic tomorrow." QB, you are about as impressive as a stoner jiffy lube attendant who bought the winning lottery ticket. [quote]I can't fail.[/quote] Leave it to QB to stand on his knees with dried tears on his face, some Saudi dude's saliva swishing in his mouth, and blood dripping from his anus and declare, "I WIN AT LIFE!"[/quote]