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Editor's Note: On October 20th, 2006, the unthinkable happened. It so traumatized Caltrops webmaster Ice Cream Jonsey that he was unable to EVEN come to any sort of grip with this horror, this unspeakable sickening, until over a year later. With great fortune, the Xbox Camera Outrage of 2006 was captured and analyzed by Fussbett Sanitario, an artist. Without further ado, we present the text of this disturbing incident in full.
 So I just bought the xbox live vision pack with uno and a camera. I'm excited because my friends have to saying how much fun this is to play. On my first game online, I'm with one friend and two other people with cameras. After a couple seconds I do a double take because there is a close up of gamer
XBOX360MASTER MASTERUBATING.
I cannot even begin to describe how disgusting this was for me and my friend. There are little kids on xbox live. I of course filed a complaint against him. But I think this kind of behavior should have 0 tolerance and this person should be banned for ever. I can see be his 0 rep that he's probably done this several times before, and gets off by this.
What can I do to escalate this matter. I'm sure many other can attest to his behavior. I want to have fun, and I don't mind swearing, or trash talking. But I'm sure as any guy can attest, this is the last thing on earth I want to see.
FS: I love that this happened on his first try. No honeymoon period, just an elevator to hell. This guy wants to have fun, don't get him wrong. A little bawdy talk is fine with him.
 I agree. I was playing Uno while my mom was visiting from out of town and was sweating bullets that something like that wouldn't happen.
Is that a complaint? Somehow this makes Uno seem much more exciting.
Oh yeah, did I mention my wife was in the room. She already wonders why I am paying for a subscription to play video games online, and now she saw this pervert. I didn't even know what to say to her.
CAN SOMEONE TALK TO MY WIFE FOR ME PLEASE? I don't even HAVE THE WORDS.
I like that he came back to add on this extra icing to the disgusting cake. Did he mention that his WIFE saw a PENIS? Well she did, and now you can cut the shame in their house WITH A KNIFE.
Plus no more sex.
I think this is a criminal act. I know one of the people in the room was a minor. If he did this in the street he would get arrested, I don't know why this is any different.
On the street VERSUS in your home. Which one will get you arrested and what's the difference?
 did he look like a minor? If so, it would just be a slap on the wrist. If not, then yes, it would be considered indecent exposure to minors with criminal charges brought against him
Not a slap on the wrist so much as a slapping of the salami. Don't fall into this trap and admit that you watched a minor jerk off, man.
I have no idea. It was unfortunately just a close up. The most horrible part is that it took us like 20 seconds to figure out what he was doing. My friend and I just kept on saying "is he doing what we think he is". Then we got the "money shot" and I almost puked.
We watched it and watched it and watched it until we were absolutely positive that we were disgusted.
I was looking for a number to call someone at xbox directly, but I think they only want to handle these issues through the xbox live complaints.
HAVE YOU TRIED SHOUTING RIGHT AT YOUR XBOX? HELLO XBOX?!
 we are in a world where sexual immorality is the norm, cryign about it isn't goign to change anything, you made you beds now lie in it.
Whoa, Jesus Christ's gamertag is apparently "Toasty Toaster".
 I too hope he gets banned, forever. It is up to us to maintain the XBox Live Community as a fun place, where everyone can enjoy themselves. We must be vigilante and not allow ourselves to become jaded to this type of behavior. Every inappropriate act or comment should be reported and I hope Microsoft takes each one seriously.
The stench of moderator is strong on this one.
 What about jerking off a dog? Would that be considred a crime or inaproriate?
TOUCHÉ! Did anyone even consider this new angle? Someone call King Solomon. If he says he's going to cut the dog in half, quickly ask to spare it's life and the King will let you jerk the dog off anyway.
if the guy wants to fulfil himself on camera that is his right given to him by the extreme left. don't make me get the aclu involved, or else it will be illegal to discriminate agianst mber's on xbox360 camera.
as for the 10-17 year olds, they hand out *** liek they are handshakes.
Agenda: SPRUNG. Toasty Toaster crosses his arms and sits back in his office chair. A big smile spreads across his face, "Now... reap what you've sown".
 I think this problem will solve itself on Nov. 17th. That way. all of the little immature perverts will move on from XBOX Live over to Sony. Then, it's their problem and we can have our respectable community back without perverts and fanboys.
There's always room for a little console bashing.
 So far I haven't seen anything this bad. I too would have to explain to my wife that I am NOT a pervert and that this is not the norm.
There sure isn't very much trust and communication in these marriages. :( Also "pervert" = homosexual.
 we don't wanna see a small c*** on cam no wonder it took them ages to figure out what it was i know the camera has a zoom but it probably wasn't good enough to go that close.
This person only wants to see big cocks on cam. Preferably black and uncut (that's subtext).
That's where I stopped, but it goes on for five more pages. This problem goes way back to 1983, the Journey arcade game losing it's high score camera when someone flashed it during the testing in an arcade.
 Fussbett
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